Feelings of loneliness

I don’t exactly know what advice I’m really looking for, I just need something. I’ve been struggling with what I believe is depression for 6 years. I’ve reached out for help countless times, never receiving any. I am quite literally on my own. To be more specific, I think I’m struggling mostly in the summer and winter time. In summer, I am alone, not distracted by my school work. Whereas in the winter, I’m too surrounded by family to the point where I get unbelievably stressed and annoyed. When I actually catch up with myself, I recognize how I feel and it hits me all at once sometimes. I hate that I struggle to explain it. Music helps a lot, but almost every time I come to take a break and really realize how I’m feeling, I make rash decisions and typically hurt myself. I don’t know if it’s a habit, but it is a problem, which I have learned I cannot solve on my own, but I also can’t solve if I reach out for help and am unable to receive it. My mom doesn’t really think I need help. My dad hasn’t treated me terribly for years, and that hasn’t helped anything. So, when I reach out for help I go to my mom. I think she just thinks I get sad when my dad treats me poorly, which is far from true. I just don’t know what to do. I’m not exactly sure how to handle these things myself anymore but I’m not sure if change is possible.

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Hey @oli,

I’m so sorry to hear about what you’re going through. When you say that you’ve reached out for help in the past, what exactly does that consist of? For example, with someone who is struggling with clinical anxiety/depression, I would highly recommend reaching out to a licensed psychologist and psychiatrist. There is NO shame in doing so; it takes a strong person to admit that they need help and to reach out accordingly!

Loneliness can either make-or-break someone, depending on if you’re and introvert or an extrovert. If you experience feelings of anxiety during periods of alone-time, then it sounds like you might benefit from being around people more frequently (even if it’s just around strangers at a local Starbucks). Hopefully this could help ease the struggle during the summertime. During the wintertime you mentioned that you’re around your family a lot and this can insinuate periods of anxiety and stress. Is it possible to spend less time with family and more time with friends?

It’ll get better in time, I promise. Hold fast, you got this!

-Eric

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Hey Oli! I’ve been suicidal and depressed since is was 12 years old and fast forward 10 years later I still have those thoughts. I also have PTSD. Yea im fucked up mentally…I know lol. I just recently started dealing with my depression because I finally decided to accept that I might need help. Like Eric said, you have to switch it up. spend more time with friends instead. add me on Xbox if you have one. My GT is iSwankk. Idk how to deal with my own depression let alone someone else’s but we can learn together. One thing I do know though is you have to start making yourself uncomfortable. You have to start getting out of your comfort zone and try new ways of combating your depression and anxiety. Don’t allow yourself to grow comfortable with your continuous cycle of depression. Love you -Stylin

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Hi Oli. I’m so glad you chose to reach out to us here and share your story. Just addressing the last sentence in your post… The fact you are here, sharing your story proves that change is very much possible and that part of you knows that and is clinging to it. I’m sorry that you feel like you’re mother doesn’t understand when you so bravely try and reach out to her. As mentioned in some of the other responses, is getting outside help a possibility for you? I know in some places the wait times are horrendous but if it’s an option to get on a wait list, there are resources around that can help you to hold through until your call. I don’t know if you know about HeartSupports books ReWrite and Dwarf Planet? ReWrite is an amazing resource for people experiences self harm in any form and might help you to understand your situation a little better. Dwarf Planet is something that will help you explode your depression and help you to understand what is going on and would be a great thing for you to use until you can get into some type of therapy/counselling. As someone who has suffered with addictions and suicidal thoughts for a lot of my life with no one around, I can understand how you feel. You’re not alone. You can get through this. Keep coming back to the support wall and reaching out - it’s a big step towards you changing your life.

Kayla

hey @oli I am sorry you are feeling lonely… and I am sorry you be been depressed for at least 6 years. by the way good job for reaching out countless of times. and I am sorry that you are struggling in the summer and winter time. Just know no matter what, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!. you are an amazing person… please don’t hurt yourself physically . you have us that you came to and we are so proud of you for telling us how you feel. you are one awesome person for opening up and telling us about your struggle on your loneliness. I don’t know if I said this already you are not alone you have us and your friends and family and hearts Support too. if you need anything my twitter is @allaroundashley… message me there anytime you need to talk. Just remember YOU ARE WORTH IT and remember to hold fast friend. we love you
-ashley

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