i feel like a failure lost all my friends, trust in my parents feels like i can’t trust anyone can’t tell anyone anything i have completely lost my mind. Been having panic attacks not telling anyone, anxiety has been off the wall, corner myself in my bed room cry super duper hard tell myself i can’t do anything right because i’m a loser i’m stupid i don’t make sense to anyone. No one seems to understand how i feel i can’t control myself anymore i blow up on people and start yelling qt them for no reason feel sad 24/7 behind on everything. How much worse can this possibly get? i’m better off dead 
I can see that you are very overwhelmed. I know it may feel like it isn’t worth it or that you’d be better off dead, but that just isn’t true. You are worth fighting for. Your happiness and peace is worth fighting for. I know it’s hard and it’s espcially hard to know where to start but we are always here for you. You were not meant for a life of misery. I know you will overcome.
Hold Fast,
Hannah Rhodes
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Do you have a therapist or councilor that you can talk to? These professionals aren’t allowed to confide in other people. There is usually a confidentiality excerpt. Might be a good choice to get one if possible.