I stayed stayed alive just to hate life more?

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Back in May, I had come to the realization that my life is nothing, meaningless, and I really wanted to kill myself. I had taken a total of 12 pills. All that happened was me staying up for 3 days straight.
I want to try again.

I haven’t felt any better since then. I’ve only felt more hate, anger, and sadness. All I want to do is die.

I canceled therapy the other day. There is no point in continuing if I can’t be honest with her about my attempts and I can’t afford to be hospitalized.

I feel constantly alone and my life will not pick up. If I could, I’d give my remaining days to someone else who wants to live.

I’m done with this life.

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Hey @Megadave020 - I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling, but I’m proud of you for wanting to continue to fight, even if it’s just by attending therapy sessions, because it shows a willingness to want to get better and to have a will to live. If you keep fighting and learn new techniques to diffuse anger, I promise that it’ll get better. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but it will. Hang in there. We care about you.