I still love her, now what do I do?

As many of you know I was dating a young lady who was also a user on here… For a while our relationship was going great and then GRHS Prom 2018 happened… That night was an absolute disaster to say the least, mainly because she broke up with me that night and left me sitting in my car crying. Then 2 weeks later she wanted to fix things because she would be going to a depression treatment center in Texas and wanted our relationship to be able to begin when she returned. Well that fell apart as well for two reasons: she refused to talk to me and because I broke a promise to help out with my church’s VBS. She then decided to begin to flirt with my best friend before she left. She has been in Texas for over 2 months now. My best friend has stated he wants to date her when she returns, even when I say that I still love her. I have no idea if she loves me and I feel all alone. No cares that this happened, I am just told that I MIGHT find someone someday. I honestly feel like that is not going to happen. She did truly love me, her past ghosts and her mental health kept getting in the way. The many reasons no one else could ever love me include: I am overweight (I am working on that), I am extremely eccentric, most people either fear me or hate me, and so on. All that keeps me going is a close friend from work, hope, and a band called For King & Country. I feel more alone by the day and could use help.
Thanks for reading the ramble,
Christian

4 Likes

The best thing you can do is to focus on yourself. Get involved in the things you’re passionate about and do things that make you happy. I know this is much easier said than done. I am struggling with feelings over my last ex who I knew I had to break up with a while ago, so I totally feel you on this one.

To be honest, she’s not the girl for you. If she left you for your friend she’s clearly not about loyalty and it could have ended much worse. And he isn’t really your friend because he wouldn’t do that to you if he was. Don’t worry about the parts of yourself that you see as flaws. Working on the weight is a good idea for health reasons, but someone who truly cares for you will see you for the person you are inside. I have no shortage of flaws myself, but the people in my life somehow see something in me that I don’t. There are people out there who will see the good in you as well. I guarantee that.

You have value. No matter how alone you feel, there are always people who care about you. Stay strong.

2 Likes

I think your problem is She doesn’t love you. Her other problem is she isn’t focusing on herself. If she is messing with your friend while she is in Texas as in texting and such. I’m sorry but she isn’t focusing on herself. I’m sorry but I think it be best if you both focus on yourself. Also your “Friend” is not your friend if you told him what you have done and they’ve just dismiss your feelings. Avoid him at least until you’ve focus on yourself and get in a better situation because right now your “girl” & your “friend” are triggers.

3 Likes

Well things got worse this weekend. My friend from work (not the one that likes my ex, he is my third friend; not a ranking just how things are being ordered.) “forgot” that we were going to hang out on Sunday. I had mentioned that I liked at one point, and I believe that might how she “forgot”. So, that leaves me with one friend that I can really talk to and he has overprotective parents so I cannot even talk to him. In other words my two friends are unavailable and I am completely alone. I don’t why friends are such a “blessing”. I usually screw up friendships/relationships anyways so… Everyone says that I will find more friends and find someone who loves me, but the reality is that I am better off alone. People who really know me agree. I just wish I had a person that I could trust and be personal with. As usual though, I screw things up and I am alone.

Hey! Don’t put yourself down, i am sure she loved you too. you’re a very warm hearted person and a great person inside and out. There are plenty of fish in the sea she must have just not been the right one, everything happens for a reason and if she can’t see how good of a person you are then she’s not worth your time. Also, your friend does not sound like he is a very good friend, try to reach out a little more and meet new people to be friends with. Things will be okay!