You know. I always worry when I am in a good place in life. It is as if I need to destroy it in some way because, frankly, I am used to it.
How grotesque is it to say that you are used to being hurt, it doesn’t seem fair to the outside, but it has become a comfort for me.
No matter how much I think about this, I find myself doing really well in life. I am trying to find love (which hasn’t been going too well but I haven’t been heartbroken at least), I am working on school, I am going to fun events, and I am actually hanging out with my friends. I am in a really great place in my life.
The only worry I have is that I will mettle with things and fall back to being a depressed mess. I know that at times it is inevitable, so I am going to try and milk as much from this experience as I can.
It can at least be something that I can look back on and smile knowing that I can be happy and I can do this.
I want to apologize if this post is all over the place and hard to understand. I am kind of just spewing the first things that come to my mind, which can sometimes been incomprehensible haha!
Hope you all have a wonderful day!