I'm never going to amount to anything

I dream of being in a rock band and trying to help people out with music. I find it so hard to communicate, so music’s my way.
But doubts keep creeping into my mind and crushing all my hopes. A favorite artist of mine who’s been really successful said he spent his teenage years in bands. I’m 15, and I’ve never been in a band. The idea of going to LA and having my first actual band when I’m first going into the music industry seems juvenile, ridiculous, and hopeless. I know its stupid. And you might think, ‘well start a band now then, it’s better late than never.’
I can’t talk to people very well, and it’s so hard to make new friends. I can’t even approach someone myself, I’m afraid of making a fool of myself and not knowing what to say. If you have any pointers on learning to talk to people I’d appreciate it.
Also, my family. I know they won’t approve of me going into the music industry and their opinion and support means alot to me. I haven’t actually told them, but I know what they’re like. They’re not bad people, but theyre strict, and number one lesson in life is find a career that’ll support you and a family. A rock band starts off rocky, trust me I know. I’m so worried I’ll fail and end up homeless, that maybe this isn’t the career for me, I’ll end up wasted all the time and drugged, I’ll change my mind halfway through and then what?
If my familY doesnt approve of rock bands, which they definitely do not, how am I supposed to start a band now with my family at every window? I don’t have anyone to drive me, I don’t want to lie, they could take my guitar away, and then what?
I feel hopeless and doubtful. Am I too lazy to do this? Am I good enough?

hi friend,
thanks for sharing this with us. I can tell you have a lot of passion for music and it plays a big part in your life.
When you have these doubts, I encourage you to come back here so we can tell you how these doubts are wrong. You have the power to do anything that you dream of. Absolutely no one can stop you. You say your parents won’t approve. I don’t think this should stop you from pursuing music. No one in the music industry made it easy! I’m sure that there were plenty of parents that were 100% against their child going into the music industry, because like you said, things can happen where it doesn’t work out. But nothing happens when you let doubt hold you back. I encourage you to pursue things that interest you. Maybe think of something both you and your parents enjoy then also do music. It may not be what you want to do right now, but you gotta start somewhere.
Also, who said you have to have a band? Maybe you could start off doing it by yourself, then others will come around and will want to join you. I want to encourage you to try talking to others at your school about music. I know that’s easier said than done but I know that there is a community out there who is looking for the same thing you are.
Also, I think you have a good head on your shoulders. I wouldn’t worry about losing yourself. You are a very kinda and brave person and I think you’re gonna be just fine, my friend. If you choose your mind, that’s okay. Then you’ll find another hobby or find a way to express yourself through music in a different way. You are gonna be okay my friend. I promise.
Love you friend. Stay strong. You got this.

Hey Bvblover16,
My dream is to also be in a rock band. If your passion is truly in music, you should never give that up. I doubt myself all the time about not being good enough to be in a band and if people would even like my music or me or if I would be making a fool of myself. But you got to think positive about it and say I will do this and I will be successful. Please don’t doubt yourself. You are good enough. Try to meet new people, maybe they want to start a band too. If being in a band doesn’t work out there’s other things to do with music.