Joseph Life Story

Good Evening,

My name is Joseph. I was watching a stream that posted a link to heart support and I felt motivated to post my life’s story. I feel stuck at the moment and am not sure what to do. I figure I would number my below story to try to organize it :smiley:

  1. I graduated from high school. I went to college for Computer Technology. I learned the basics of the computer, a few programming languages, how to run an anti virus and how to be IT support.

  2. I graduated and found a job in a few months and moved to Connecticut. My job was to try to take a website and database of a company and build it up and fix it up to be better. I failed at this and had no idea what I was doing. It is a large company though, so they gave me another position as a software tester.

  3. Software Tester- What I did was a made sure websites for companies worked. It started off small like for restaurants and Hotels. I ended up testing some memorable sites like Aruba island and Saints Row IV. If you visit their websites, I helped with making sure it worked. :slight_smile: What they would do is they have me write them a bug document on how it works any defects.

  4. Eventually- The software testing job built up to testing medical software. They gave me an opportunity to drive 1000 miles to Wisconsin and work for Accuray (www.accuray.com). I tested their software while it was in development. They treat cancer using the Tomotherapy and Cyberknife machines, radiation laser treatment, as you may see on their website. I would run the program and report defects and they would fix them. It lasted about a year, the software was completed and I moved back home.

  5. Since then, my job has informed me that they are looking to keep employees with computer programming skills, which based on my previous work has clearly never worked out. I tried several projects at work and always struggled with computer programming.

  6. Since then, I have worked for about a year and a half at a job, which is kind of hard to explain, but basically I tell everyone it is a collection agency. People receive a letter in the mail from us informing them they owe a company money, those people call us, and then we demand money from them. Some of my coworkers call out to people, though they haven’t had me do that much.

  7. I have lied to my parents the whole time saying it is customer service and I help people with their accounts, since I don’t want them to know I work for a collection agency.

  8. So, the way I look at my life, Is I went down hill from helping a company that treats cancers to telling people who have cancer they can’t have internet because they have a balance on their credit report I am not allowed to remove until they pay.

  9. I do not know how to possibly explain how I feel except dead on the inside. I live each day feeling stuck in a hole and have no idea how to get out, as you can see in the previous bullet.

  10. When looking at my life, there are a few positive notes that I hang on to try to look at the positives. I don’t currently have any debt, I am not a customer of my collection agency. My car was given to me by parents, so I have no car payments, though it is getting quite old. I still have a love for multi player games, like MMOs, I still enjoy playing them. Also, I got into investing, it isn’t quite stocks, but it is hard to explain and similar to it, I like it.

  11. My life goals are to make friends and build my life up and get out of the collection agency while still making enough to not owe debt.

To Summarize
sorry if I went on for a while, I felt like I really needed to get out my life story somewhere. For everyone who read to the end, I appreciate it and any advice.

Regards,
PervySages (Joseph)

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Life has a way of making things feel right if you give it the time. What I mean by this is that if you keep on, things may eventually improve. You have a marketable skill, and I’m sure you could go into a career that’s more fulfilling to you.

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Hey, thanks for posting! The HeartSupport community is always here for you :slight_smile:

First of all, you have an education and experience from some kick ass jobs! You’ll find a job that makes you happy soon enough. You have goals set in your mind, as long as you keep working on them, you can do anything. Until then tho, keep in mind that you’re doing your job, you’re not responsible for putting people in that position. Even if you have to tell a cancer patient they cant have internet because of payments, it’s not you who’s causing that to them - it’s a sum of number of things, like health care costs, internet provider costs, their income etc. etc. things that have absolutely nothing to do with you and things you cant prevent. Someone else would be telling them that anyway - as long as you do it without aggressively shouting at them, they’re lucky it’s you.

You’ve done a bunch of awesome stuff in your life, and you will achieve a lot more! Keep your chin up and keep going friend, your life goals are just around the corner. <3

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Hey @pervysages,

First off, I want to welcome you to HeartSupport! I hope you find a sense of safety and refuge within this amazing community. :slight_smile:

Secondly, thank you for sharing your story with us! It takes a lot of courage to let a bunch of strangers know what’s going on in your life.

I’m terribly sorry to hear that you’re going through a really rough time right now. Are you able to retreat back to your previous job, or find a different type of job that helps people (while still doing what you love)? You sound like a really smart dude with a pretty solid foundation, so I’m sure you wouldn’t have a problem with finding a new job. You’re still young, so there isn’t much of a problem hopping from job-to-job (after all, we millennials are known for doing that anyway lol).

I’m really glad to hear that you’re looking at the flip-side of your situation, and it’s really healthy for you to continue doing that. You and I are in a similar situation (young and finding out where our true passion lies within the workforce), and I do a similar thing, where, when I’m going through a sucky season in life, I try to focus on things like, “At least my car is paid off” or “At least I’m in good company” etc. I’m a strong advocate for speaking words of life over yourself, so keep up the good work!

-Eric

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