Its been a minute since I’ve been on here. I’m kinda stuck in a bad place. I feel really really lonely and uncared for. I know hey thats a lie. It’s hard to believe other wise though. Actions speak louder than words and lately no ones shown it. Im going to be graduating high school soon and i feel like still need someone to guide me. I need help with so much before i can actually be on my own. I don’t want someone babying me or Doing things for me. Just a little push to get myself on my own two feet. Problem is I don’t have that even living with my family still. Another problem is that my friends seem to never text me. I always text or call first and when someone does its because somethings wrong. Which i don’t mind at all i want to be there. It just adds more to that feeling of no one genuinely caring. They’re all genuinely good people and obviously we’re all dealing with our own demons. I just slowly feel myself shutting down. I’ve self harmee again which hasn’t happened since 2017 and i literally find it so hard to talk to anyone. Im scared to because I’ll be ignored or rejected or the conversation goes no where. In all honesty i just want someone here for me. I dont want to have to be alone. I understand that so many of my friends all have their own problems and reasons. I feel so insignificant because of ot though. It breaks my heart feeling like this knowing my friends do too.
A thought that you may find comfort in: smooth seas don’t make a skilled sailor. Without challenges in life, we won’t grow as people. You seem like the sort of person who wants to become better and stronger so take on the challenges that are coming ahead with the intention of becoming stronger because of them.
When I finished High School I also felt completely lost. You aren’t alone in feeling that way, I’d argue most people feel that way for a while. The funny thing is, we all seem to find our way. Don’t let the idea of an unknown future paralyze you in the present; the small steps that we take today lay the foundation for the future ahead.
As for friends, I am sorry you feel as though they don’t want to hang with you. Still you have the insight to know that they are possibly dealing with their own problems which is not something people often remember. Keep reaching out to the people you want to keep in your life. If you have one or two close friends who truly know you in your life, I’d say you have done well. This tumultuous period in your lives will pass.
There are always people on heartsupport to talk to. If you ever need someone to talk to you can rest assured you will find someone here willing to help.
Don’t give up friend, you are stronger than you think.
Hi friend, thanks for reaching out.
I’ve been in the same situation in the past and i know how hard it is to find your own path without a guide. Back then I made some decision, never listened to what people had to tell me, but it contributed to the shaping of the present me. You can never foresee the future, but if you’ll ever find yourself into bad situations, or stuck into something you might not feel it’s for you, try seeing the bigger picture. Sometimes losing is winning.
I can also understand the part about your friends not texting you and stuff. When you realise texting means nothing, you’re life will be way better. I can go days without hearing about a friend now, and it feels better than ever. Unfortunately everyone’s busy and it’s hard to keep track of everyone. Shutting your phone off is a good way to learn this, because you quickly find out how much you’re tied to the use of always being in need of your phone vibrating.
You’re not insignificant because of this, so keep going and remember there is so much more waiting for you. Good things take time. Don’t underestimate the time spent alone. Sometimes we need that.
Love you ╳