hi, I’m new here…and wanna say that this whole month has been going down hill and I’ve been trying to cope with it but it all crash down when I meet him.
When I meet him online the first time, we clicked so well…talked all day and almost everything and everyday…NOW THIS IS THE ISSUE
I fell in love with him over the one month…and it was killing me cause I had frequent headaches from overthinking, wanting to commit suicide, wanted to self-harm myself, wanted to get hit by a vehicle,play a dangerous game of suicide with cars(where I lay on the road when there are no cars and see my reaction and speed when a car is near like sooo dam near).
Every often, I would cry for unknown reasons, hate myself…
Hi friend, I’m so sorry you are hurting right now.
I can completely relate to that self hate. I have been battling this for so long. It’s hard because I’m trying to carry a healthy life and a healthy relationship and each day I’m fighting mental health, dark thoughts and deep hate for myself.
You are not alone.
I’m truly an sorry that you are fighting with this. I know the hardships it comes with. I know so much of the challenges and difficulties that have to be faced and how hard it can be to over come them.
Despite how hard it is, for me, I try very hard to seek out help. I’ve been in therapy, I’ve seen a life counselor, I got a psychiatrist and put on medication. I was seeing a few specialists for my varying physical and mental health issues and trying really hard to fight for healing and recovery. It’s been a long road. I’m still hurting but there has been progress.
My advice to you, friend, is to keep reaching out like you are now. If you need to reach out to loved ones like a family member or maybe even a counselor, please don’t be afraid to. I know finding the right counselor can take time, but the right one can help you through these dark emotions that you are fighting. The daily life of bipolar disorder. Which I to am facing. And now I’m unmedicated which makes it even harder.
I just want you to know how important and valued you are. You matter. Your life matters. Your feelings matter. What you are going through matters. And I hope that you are able to find the strength and courage to fight for yourself. To get the help you need so you can work through this. So that you can live a fulfilled and happy life.
It’s not an easy feat. I’m currently going through it myself. And there are so many days I want to give up. Today has hardly started and I myself have spent most of my night and morning feeling like giving up.
But I’m pressing on and I’m going to keep fighting. I’m right there with you friend. I may not have the answers but I’m walking along side with you. Offering you love and support and a place of no judgement.