Hi. So as many of you know after years of photographing I did my first shooting as a model today. It wasn’t a complete disaster but damn…not a single photo worth posting.
Problem is: I work as an online influencer (insert laugh here) and it’s been my job since last year. However, I’ve always been behind the camera and almost never in front and always cut my face off in photos (I shoot stuff alone and I don’t like my face) but the agency I work for wants my face on the gram. So do others interested in my work.
I said ok, let’s do that, but now I feel completely powerless and unworthy, as I can’t do my job anymore. Shooting today was fun, but pics aren’t good enough (I take way better quality photos unfortunately) and now I’m out of new material to post. I’ll have another shooting tomorrow, one on Monday and probably another next week. However, I feel like it will always be like this. I need this job to pay for my studies and stuff, and I invested a lot of time and money into it and I cannot go back or quit. However, I feel almost no reason to actually keep going.
Will it be better? I feel like a complete idiot wasting his time. I know not having photos to post is no big deal, but I live with this and I need new stuff. And I need my ugly face in it.
Please send your best advice/support. I’ve never felt this bad since March.
Edit: shooting was good today. It felt more natural and I managed to get some good pics out of it. I still feel out of place, and I also fear all of the people I know will make fun of me because of this thing.