So today is the day I had my competition, of course writing this on the way back to finals ; during the performance I don’t know what exactly happened but I felt like something happened, it think it was my anxiety acting up . When I was done marching off I started to take my gloves off . Then I hurried and grabbed water then went over took a knee , and all I remember was me kinda freaking out and I ended up crying and an adult got the director. It’s hard for me to perform /talk infront of crowds ;why? But turns out we made finals . Why did this have to happen ?
Hi there Ashley 
I don’t have a definite anwser of why this happend. But what i can say is that you’re anxiety doesn’t define you. Even though i haven’t formally met you, i’m sure you are an amazing person. Anxiety is a tough one, especially with performing! One thing i can share with you is before a performance or whenever you want. Stand like a superhero. There was a study that showed that doing this before going on stage or going in front of people helped calm there anxiety and they went on sage with more gusto! And also don’t be afraid to reach out to a counselor or pastor to help! Everything will be well. Hope you guys do great at finals! and don’t worry! Gods got you and He cares for you!
What helps me with my anxiety if I’m around people is to a) pretend they’re not there or b) take a 5 minute break hiding somewhere before I return to where I was. (I also don’t look at people I stare above their heads or through them as if they’re invisible.)