I usually don’t post anything about how I feel, anywhere. I see journals as my goto but I also see no harm in trying this out once. I’m a big fan of abr and remembered that this site existed. I’m sorry if this turns into a nonsensical rant. I work at a retail store, im a freshly eighteen adult and usually describe my mood and general disposition as happy; optimistic. Open minded. Always doing my best to come up with/seek out new things to look forward to, invest myself in, and cherish. It’ll soon be about 9-10 months since I graduated, and looking back I’m coming to realize my head isn’t always in the top notch I imagine it being. I think I may struggle with some anxiety for sure. A sibling past away last year in August and I’ve been handling well but can’t help but feel like the mundane is never mundane anymore. I’ve been reminded of the fragility of life and how tomorrow is never promised. As a male, I’m told that we process grief differently than girls, in that we can bottle up that sadness and hurt and kind of “stuff” it away, to be dealt with later. Its sort of a defense mechanism I guess, I don’t know the therapist never went too into it. But after about half a year to process I’m seeing some truth in her words, I can’t be this okay and unscathed after the death of someone that close to me. I know I’m okay now but I will eventually have to come to terms with what happened and live on in her name, as peacefully as I can. On kind of a different line of thought, I think I mainly wanted to say something on here because I’ve been feeling lonely. Posting something on an anonymous message board is, I understand, a very hit or miss thing. I don’t really expect to make any serious connections on here but really to express how seriously isolated and lonely post graduation can be. In the time I’ve left high school, I’ve met with the true reality that a majority of the students you befriend in high school just won’t stay on your same level after graduation. Everyone has different career paths, personalities, schedules and reaching out can surely be difficult. Mix that with a family tragedy and you’re looking at a potentially very troubled kid. So if anyone reads this, please be gentle to those around you. You never know if the clerk checking you out is dealing with a close loss, or if he’s struggling with anxiety, panic attacks, financial issues… everyone has battles and we should all love on one another and support each other. Celebrate your victories and those of others. Thanks for reading this insanely dramatic cancer-written prompt, thanks and bye <3
Hey there,
I’m really happy you decided to reach out and share what’s been going on. I know first hand how difficult it can be to open up and let people know what’s happening. Please know that everyone here is there for you, and always feel free to message anyone of us for anything! I find myself in a similar situation as I am about to graduate from college. I have no idea what I am doing afterwards, and it’s caused relapses in my depression and anxiety big time. Anytime we complete a step in life like school or a new job it seems typical for us to sit back and examine reality. It certainly gets overwhelming and can make you feel alone in your battle. Like you said everyone is fighting their own battle, but we must all be there as brothers and sisters helping others along.
What we have to realize is that we will be okay, and that there are always people who will be there and love us. Even when it feels like the world is against you know that everyone on this site loves and cares for you. I am certainly here for if you ever feel the need to talk, vent, or just let things out.
Remember you are loved and cared for!