I’m struggling to find any motivation. Kind of losing hope.
Every night for the past few days I get to this point and I get very depressed and I can’t grt out of it. My medication dose was increased but I still feel depressed.
Sometimes it’s hard to do anything because my body just hurts from anxiety and depression it seems. Still I am applying to jobs but still nothing. I applied to my old job which they stated they would love to have my back but they did not further with my application because I got low scores on whatever was graded, I don’t even know what or how.
I have no motivation. I don’t know what to do.
I’m really struggling so advice is appreciated.
Once again I’m falling behind in college and I just don’t know if this is for me.
To be honest you push yourself to be motivated. Either by hyping yourself up through excitement, fear or anger. This is how I do it. TBH though lately I too can’t get much excited or anything towards motivation for anything. I push myself just to get out of bed.
So I understand. I think about my goals which I have written down even use one of those “use your to do list as an rpg” apps (example liferpg or the one I’m using now is epic win. I tried Habitica but It was a bit too complicated for me to understand fully and use efficiently.) The trick is to treat yourself with something that you enjoy after doing a task you don’t have motivation to do. Which ends up sucking when you’ve no motivation.
My secret is I become a bit of a scumbag and start blaming the world for what I don’t like. For instance I use to have a huge problem with cleaning. I would rarily clean because I got sick of starting it and not finishing it. I started blaming people for me not cleaning. Example: "I don’t do my laundry because I don’t have a job so there is no reason to do my clothes! Fuck this world! I get enough anger stirred up that now I got energy to do the laundry. So then I say “I am going to do my laundry because I know when I’ve a job I want to look nice for it.”
You just force yourself at first then you basically browbeat yourself until you do it. When I first started this I sort of used thoughts to sort of make it normal for me. I use to hate myself so much. So I would clean or do one of my goals as a punishment to myself. I know it seems weird. I used it as a way to keep from burning myself because I am a burner so when I stopped or I should say started to quit I nedded a replacement so I did chores because what else could be very agonizing to do that could punish me almost as much as burning myself? Forcing myself to do things that I have no motivation to do.
So when I do a task on my bucket list or anything I have several of thoughts going through my head; “This has to get done”, “Nobody is going to help me” , “I want to do it” , “It bothers me”, “I already started might as well finish it now” , “These people want me to not do anything so I am going to do at least this” & “Fuck this world, I’m doing it.”
Then I forced myself to do it. Now I don’t do everything yet I do at least one thing so I can say that I made progress.