What is wrong with me?

Normally I rather like myself, but today was terrible. And that’s just it. One small part of it was bad, and it wouldn’t even seem that bad to someone who was actually there. And then the whole day is just ruined with me beating myself up.
I feel so awkward and so weird. I feel like I don’t know anything about this society I live in. And I should. Whats wrong with me? Why am I so stupid and clueless? People these days in my generation are so confusing and harsh in general. Or am I too soft/kind? I feel like I failed myself. This isn’t who I want to be. It’s happening again, when the person I call the only friend I have makes me feel bad and out of place. But she’s not a bad person. Maybe that’s just this generation. I feel like such a weirdo. I don’t fit in, I don’t agree, I don’t know what to say, is it my fault? Am I weird? Is that bad?
I hate feeling timid and not confident. I cannot have any friends treat me like trash again. I feel like I’m stuck being heaven and hell. Am I soft ? Am I a bitch?
Please help me, I hate this part of me…

I understand where you are coming from. I also have those struggles at times. Just know ur social awkwardness and anxieties is s small part of you. It isn’t the entirety of you. You are so much more than that.

I find it always helpful to take a deep breath before approaching people that I may converse with. Or to find a way out to catch my myself. I commonly use the excuse of going to the bathroom to escape for a few minutes or to leave a conversation entirely.

Hope this helps

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@Bvblover16,

Thank you for being so transparency and honest! I hear what you are saying and can relate.

In these moments, it’s easy to be introspective and get down on yourself. I would encourage you to focus on friendships that you can say are built on genuine love and support. Friends who will uplift you and want to grow in life with you without judgement. Genuine friendship can elevate us but it truly comes down to loving ourselves more than anything and who you are. The more we can love ourselves and cultivate more long lasting genuine friendships, the more we will grow and become people we knew were there all along.

-L

Thank you @Carolyn88 and @lawrenced, it really means a lot to me to have your replies.

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