Alright so I got the nerve to go to my general care doctor today and tell a few very close close friends of mine that sadly do not live in the state with me what happened in the start of March. Sadly one of questions that keeps repeating in my mind and being asked too me is did you report too the authorities? Or are you going to report too the authorities. Well I shut down when it happened and didnt report than. I didnt know the person so is anything going to go from this. So I am very much struggling to know what to do. I dont know that I should report or not. Right now my battle is that I know if I dont this person gets away with this and gives him the chance to do this to someone else and that angers me and it hurts me. IT BREAKS ME TO THE CORE. I hate myself to let me get away with it. But than I dont feel I can do it. I dont have a strong support people here. I dont have that person here to even be with me. I would be going through the battle alone all I would have is my internet support and that isnt a physical person next to me and that too me isnt enough right now I need more than that right now. I am kicking myself and wanting to do more but than also just wanting to just scream. Lately the thoughts in my head have been dark and hard to handle. I am battling deep thoughts to just end it and battling to not let myself be numb.
Disabledmetalfan
Hey Friend,
I am so very sorry that happened to you. It is completely understandable to shut down when experiencing something so traumatic. My heart breaks for you and I want you to know that you are very very strong. I know the idea of going through this whole process alone without someone physically by your side is terrifying. I know this online community isn’t the same as that, but should you choose to go to the authorities with the information you have, we will be here for you. I guess the question is, even though it will be unpleasant and wont be easy, will you feel more guilty if you don’t go to the authorities? In the end, the choice is yours and you know what is best for you and your mental health. Know that we are here to support you because we love you very much. Stay strong, I know you can get through this.
Hold Fast,
Hannah Rhodes
@Hannah2911 thank you it is just right now I am sitting at I dont want to go do that and than shut down there and not be able to keep going. Sadly currently with everything going on I think honestly I dont know if I would be able to handle it. If I do this I really need another strong sole near me. I dont feel strong enough to go forward with this. I dont feel strong enough to fight this. And that is why I dont know if I can go to the authorities. Like I just wish I had someone here that could be here because right now all I want is a supportive hug that makes me feel safe.
Disabledmetalfan
I don’t blame you for wanting any of that. It’s very intimidating and scary. I can understand your hesitation. I am proud of you for fighting though and continuing on. You are more than what has been done to you. Here is a supportive virtual hug from me! I know myself and the rest of the community believe in you even if you don’t believe in yourself yet.
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