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I'll never get better

Struggling and self sabatoge (4)
I want to give up already (4)
Specific Anxiety in late 20's (2)
This is my first post. I'm new here (7)
I think I'm afraid to fully recover (7)
I lost my battle with self harm (4)
Where is He? Should I just die? (3)
Slowly losing the energy to fight (4)
Can't improve anything at all (3)
I feel like I'm dying (2)
Stupid freaking illness (4)
I can’t stop and it will never get better (6)
I can't freaking do this anymore (6)
Dealing with Trauma & Jealousy (4)
Will I relapse or end it all? (2)
Am I mature enough to be an adult? (7)
Thought i share (2)
I keep sabotaging myself... (3)
Little bit about me (3)
Focusing on rather negative than positive things (3)
I'm in pain... again (3)
I don’t want to admit my struggles (3)
My story also thanks heart support (3)
They never really left (3)
I don’t deserve you (3)
I feel selfish for wanting to live (18)
Cancer and Emotional exhaustion (13)
I can't keep going anymore (8)
Idk what to do anymore (tw sexual abuse) (7)
"I have no mouth, and I must scream." (7)