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7 months (tw sh)

hi! it’s been a minute :]
there’s a few things i have on my mind.

I’m currently 7 months and 12 days clean. I’ve obviously struggled a lot getting here, but i was very content i could do it. and i still am, i want to reach a year, but lately i’ve not been feeling too well. mostly i’ve just been stressing about getting older; my 17th birthday is less than two weeks and my cat is getting older, as well. it probably sounds very silly, but the thought of her not being with me one day makes me cry. she’s the light of my life and losing her is my worst nightmare.

coming back to the original topic though, I’m struggling hard today. i’m itching to relapse. i hope i’ll be able to hang on and not do something i will regret.

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Hi friend!

Gratz on 7 months and 12 days being clean! I’m so proud of you!!!

Have you heard of urge surfing? It’s when you have an urge to self harm (or do anything harmful impulsively) but, you ride out that wave of intenseness. You wait 30 mins before you act on an urge and by the time 30 mins is up, the urge is usually gone. I would encourage you to read about it, it’s a DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) skill I just learned and its proven to work with me.

I can totally relate with you about your cat. My emotional support cat just turned 7 and I find myself thinking about how long he’ll live and how I will manage without him. It’s a scary thought, but I just try to really focus on the present and try to enjoy him right now and not worry too much about the future, because it’s not something I can change.

Take care and keep it up!

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I’m so sorry you are struggling. It’s hard on days when those urges are strong, and it seems so easy to slip back into it. Just remember how far you have come! I also agree with the above comment from Mystrose, urge surfing is a great DBT skill that has helped me with my self harm urges too. Ride that emotional wave, feel the emotions for what they are and let it wash away.

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i will definitely read into it, thank you!

i feel you. my cat turned 13 at the beginning of this month and the thought was present before but now it’s there, in the back of my mind, every day. i don’t know how i’m supposed to cope when she won’t be with me anymore.

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There will definitely be a grieving process that we’ll need to go thru and after looking briefly, I’ve found support for this type of loss online. I guess all we can do is try to live in the moment and not let our fears get in the way of enjoying our support animals. I know that sounds hard, but it’s really all we can do.

Also, cats have been known to live well into their 20s, so you may have lots more time with your kitty :rose: :cat: :hrtlegolove:

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@HeresA.Gun.KillMePlease

Thought I’d share this video about Urge Surfing. It really explains it well and she links a short meditation that might help as well at the end.

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