Hey everyone, the thing is a friend of mine recommended me this book called “The art of seduction” and it is basically about how to manipulate people… But as I’ve read about the different kinds of manipulators I realized my exgirlfriend just used me to satisfy her ego and when I was no longer useful to her she just dumped and forgot completely about me… I never loved her and I don’t want her back but it is just so painful to see how selfish and evil some people are, because I thought that at least we had some affection for each other, not love but at least something, I don’t if you get what I mean.
Now I’m feeling depressed about that, it sucks to feel this way because I’m not very used to it, I got over the worst of depression a long time ago my real struggle is the anxiety and I’m just not ok, I thought I was over my exgirlfriend and also the depression but this book brought these feelings again.
I hope I explained myself, I have so much in my head that is difficult to organize my ideas
HI friend - I’ve not read that book but it sounds enlightening and toxic all at the same time. It sucks to be face to face with people behaving only in their own self interests and for their own ego. I’m sorry you’re having to look back on your previous relationship and realize she was only serving her own ego. My hope for you is that when you are able to work through this that you will be stronger on the other side of this. <3 Be well. 
That’s a trigger. It brings the bad feelings back out of nowhere. It can be a scene in a movie, a story from a friend, a song, just something that connects the right synapse to bring back the memories and the feelings.
It sucks getting used. My ex had serious codependency issues, and in retrospect I think she used me as her safety guy while she was trying to figure things out with someone else, even if it wasn’t necessarily on purpose. It’s also not fun when someone falls in love with you and you have to convey to them that you don’t feel the same way, especially when nothing’s “wrong.”
Now take note of the pain. Don’t dwell on it, but remember it, and ask yourself if you want to inflict that on someone else with pickup artist techniques. Trying to get your kicks at the bar is one thing, but tricking someone into being in a relationship with you isn’t fulfilling. Just be mindful, and be honest with yourself and your dates.
That’s what I think about that book, in one side it made me see the real intentions of my ex but in the other is just toxic, because it gives you advice on how to get people to do what you want them to do… A shame
I’ll not dwell on the pain I’m going to continue with my life and I know that the pain will diminish as the days goes by but man, it hurts to know that I was being used… But in the end I guess it’s all my fault, I shouldn’t have started the relationship with her because I didn’t feel anything special about her it was only physical atracttion but nothing else… But she found a way to manipulate me so I felt pressured to ask her to be my girlfriend and so I did, just wrong…
It’s not your fault. We crave companionship, so we date people. We don’t marry everyone we date, and that’s a very good thing. Some relationships are better than others, and you learn a lot from the bad ones. That doesn’t make it suck less, maybe it was a mistake, and it was still toxic, but there wasn’t any fault in exploring the relationship.