At the end of 2018, I stumbled upon Heart Support during the Christmas fund-raiser event that was happening at the time. I was in a dark place, a self-inflicted depression that I had been living with for a few years. Every night I was praying for God to bring my life to an end, because my life felt worthless, pointless, and empty. I felt nothing, and I had numbed myself to the point where I couldn’t even feel sadness or frustration. I was just an empty shell, waiting to be crushed by the weight of my own insanity, alive, but not living.
That’s when I found this place, where I could talk to others who had experienced similar things as me. I posted my problem, which was basically a delusion that I had been using to cope with my depression, and somebody replied, telling me that the way I was thinking, and the shell I had built was just a charade. At first I was resistant, trying to hold on to my delusions as I had for so long, but the person persisted, and my mind was changed. That same day I was able to drop the mask of emotionlessness that I had been using for several years, and I felt something that I hadn’t felt in a long time, sadness. I didn’t eat supper that night, because of the knot in my stomach, a ball of emotion inside of me. I went to sleep, and the next morning I woke up, free of my depression. I was feeling happy, like I could choose how I felt, filter through my emotions, and make my life something worth living.
I started working out regularly, eating more, and preparing for a medical specialty school that I started attending in January. Just a week into school, I started dating (for the first time ever) a girl who loves and appreciates me, and we are living together. I never, in a million years, would have thought that somebody could love me, but that initial change that occurred right here on the wall had opened me up emotionally, enough that I was able to let somebody in. Without Heart Support I would still be alone and empty, so thank you! For everybody who posts here regularly, just know that you are making a difference, and that the time you spend here is valuable. My life was changed for the better, and the fact that you all work every day to make that a reality for others is amazing. Best wishes, all, and again, thank you so much for what you do here.
Hey friend,
It is so good to see this inspirational story on here! I am so glad that you were able to turn stuff around. Too often we see a lot of negative, but was glad to see a positive post on here. It truly means that this works, and that makes me so happy. I actually found Heart Support around the same time as you, so we definitely have that in common. I truly wish you the best, and hope your happiness continues, much love.