Alone and stuck

I just feel like no ,after what progress I make I, always in the same place as I was before Stuck and never growing I’m trying to grow mentally and in life but I always seem to fall back to where I was, I just don’t know if I should keep going or except that this is all I’m going to be.


Progress is progress, no matter how small.

I know that seems like such a cliche thing to say, but even the littlest bit of growth by taking two steps forward and then two steps back again is still growth, because you made it a little bit further than you have ever been before. All we can do is compare ourselves to where we were yesterday, last week, a year ago, even five years ago. The fact that you are still here is incredible growth, I think. Keep going!


Hey @lost,

I hate for you that you feel dragged back to the same place over and over. It’s so disheartening to put all of our energy into progressing in our life yet feeling this strange dynamic of meeting familiar places again and again, places where we feel stuck and frozen in time.

Sometimes the perception of our progress is what how we feel is all about: our perception. As long as you are trying, you are progressing, because even if you don’t reach the goals you aim for yet, you are still learning from your trials and the experiences you develop. Along the way though, you may need to work on your perception and definition of progress itself.

When you say that you are trying to grow mentally, how does this manifest practically in your life? Could you share some examples so we could understand more what this is about precisely? Same question to how it is for you when you feel stuck or moving backwards - what does it look like for you?

You are not meant to be stuck. If you’d like to dive into this with more details, then know we’re willing to talk about all of this with you and support you the best way we can. How you feel is something that many members of this community feel from time to time, and for many different reasons. There is some strength that could be developed further by sharing our experiences.

I believe in you. :hrtlegolove:


Hey Lost,

One things I can say with certainty, is that you are never ‘stuck’ with who you are right now. Though it may not be apparent, each day brings you new experiences, struggles, and lessons. Those experiences add up as times goes on, and continues to expands and changes your mental space. Though life may (and seems it always does) throw more and more at you as time goes on, you are growing and expanding with each day that you overcome.

Progress is never lost. Though you may have good days and bad, mistakes and victories… you don’t lose the lessons and achievements you’ve made in the past. Don’t forget that. Each new (or recurring) experience you face, you can draw upon those past mistakes and victories. Though gradual, this is growth.

I know it can be frustrating to feel like you aren’t moving, or moving fast enough. Keep your head up, and look at the big picture. Each step is another one forward, be it a lesson learned, or a victory made. Carry on, my friend.


From: ManekiNeko

it’s a very hard place to come to and sit in when you feel stagnant in motion. It’s something familiar to a lot of people, and I recently had the same feelings. From time to time I feel this huge sense of “what’s the point”. Why am I treading water? What is it all for? The more you think about it, the greater and bigger the question seems. It fills you with dread and a sense of “look at my life and the things I haven’t achieved”.

but here’s the good news for you, you don’t have to accomplish anything beyond what YOU want or need. So much time is spent comparing ourselves and losing our selves to what the societal or social expectations are. Screw that! People think I should do more study, or I should do this or that, or I shouldn’t be dyeing my hair, but guess what? I don’t want to study anymore! I am happy where I am, I love dyeing my hair!

what expectations are you trying to push on yourself and are they realistic? Throw away the “I should be earning this much and own a house with five dogs and a Ferrari” kind of idealisations. What is an achievable goal that you want to do because it’s what YOU want? Maybe you don’t know right now and that’s okay. It’s also okay to swap and change and try. People think we have to hold down a job at age 25 and never change and keep trying to climb the ladder. Why? Life has too much to offer to be stuck in a place you hate! You want to change careers at age 50? Do it. You want to put something on hold because you want to travel and you have the means and time to? Do it. Sure we have to be realistic about how we approach the matter, but as long as we keep moving.

my last thought is this: you have made it through day after day after day. Some days are easier, some maybe not so much. You’re here and sharing your thoughts and story with us. That’s something that isn’t going backwards. The fact that you’re trying and are here is such a wonderful thing to celebrate.


From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Friend, thank you for your post. I found your post interesting as it made me think of times that I have had similar thoughts and having those thoughts and living life has also given me the confidence to give you a reply that hopefully will help you. I am going to guess you are still pretty young and its hard to be any age and have issues, but trying to grow, struggle and not get to where you feel you should be can be worrying but here is the good news. This is not where you are going to stay! yes you are going to move forward, you are going to progress because we all do, it just takes a bit of time but then it seems to happen suddenly without even realising and one day the worries that you are having you suddenly wonder what on earth you were bothered about those for. life has a strange way of moving us forward and you will too. I hope you are ready to keep up with it. You are entitiled to have an amazing life, yes there will always be worries about something but there will be lots of good times too. Just enjoy the ride friend. Love lisalovesfeathers. x

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From: ManekiNeko

ADDIT: (ran out of words lol), but you’re here and you keep trying. That makes for such huge progress. Thank you for trying and for being here x


From: Dr Hogarth

Hi lost,

I’m certain that many in this community can relate to that feeling of being stuck; to feel that you’ve put so much effort into your journey, but not seeing results. I would echo a lot of what has been said here. Progress is subjective, and sometimes can just mean exploring different directions without taking a definite step in one direction. That’s a perfectly okay place to be.

It’s an easy trap to fall into that if we’re not meeting some sort of prescribed goals then we’re not progressing. You’re not stuck my friend, you’re just testing the waters x


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