I been feeling like such a failure, like I have failed everyone and disappointed everyone I know. I can’t talk to anyone without being judged and looked down upon, and telling me that Im depressed because “I’m living in some secret sin.” I, myself and GOD KNOW that im not being shady and doing things behind closed doors. So why can’t they just trust me? Why can’t they JUST be there for me and love me as I do for them? I genuinely care for them and love everyone. But I feel so alone and so unloved. I feel so silent. I can’t say anything anymore because when I have, I just get shut down… so I have gave into my self harm after a month. I’m so sorry I’ve let everyone down.
Recovery is rough road to follow, there are days I want to slip back into my own ways. Its also suck alot people judge you on every little thing instead letting you be human. I think whole depressed because you not fellow god plan is just bunch billshit. It nothing against religous people, but I people love is use that excuse just brainwash or one up another person. Making mistakes is part human and you cant go through life without making mistakes.
Just remeber you are not alone, I deal with similar stuff too!
I’m so sorry that you are left feeling like this. That is so incredibly frustrating. You don’t deserve to be left feeling like this. I know that people have left you feeling otherwise but you are NOT a disappointment. And I’m sorry that people are not doing better at listening and seeing more of you.
Just know that this place is open to you. This place is a safe place where you can open up and share your heart, your experiences and your story and we will not shut you down. We will try our best to encourage you, support you and lift you up.
Here you are welcomed. You are loved. We are here to remind you that you are important and you matter. Even if those around you are failing at showing you that.
You have not let us down. I’m sorry friend. I hope that you are able to find strength and courage. Comfort and peace. I hope that you are able to find someone that is safe where you can open up to and find guidance through the things that you face. You do not have to go at this alone my friend.
So much love to you. I hope it gets better.
I am so sorry you are going through this. I want you to remember you do not deserve this and you are NOT a disappointment. I understand feeling judged as I used to struggle with that because my mom taught me as a kid to give a crap about what others say. As I grew up, I learned to not care anymore as these people judging me, don’t pay my bills or do anything positive for me. Why should I live my life to please others? I just want you to remember to do whatever pleases you as long as you don’t harm anyone or yourself. You got this and stay strong!!