I’m just having a really hard time. Christianity is supposed to be about a “personal relationship with God.” But to me it makes absolutely no sense. How am I supposed to relate to someone I can’t see, hear, or touch? Someone I can’t prove exists, who is in no way like me, and is the creator and ruler of the universe, even if he loves me? No matter what theologians may say, God is not another human being.
Just as human beings can’t do what only God can, God cannot do what only human beings can. God is only my Lord and Savior, nothing else, not even my friend. To me, being a Christian is more about being a good person, no matter how much it hurts. And it will hurt.
I honestly just don’t believe I can be happy as a Christian. I became a Christian not to be happy but because it was the right thing to do. In fact, it’s the last faith I’d recommend if you want to be happy. Not to mention 90% of sins are committed out of wanting to be happy, so it only makes sense that happiness is bad for you and others.
I just can’t imagine God’s so-called plan for my life involving anything I might want. And even if it did, I would say, “There must be a catch. Nothing in life is free.”
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I can’t say anything in defense of Christianity since I’m not a Christian. What I can say in it’s simpliest form Christianity & Wicca strives for the same goals. (“Love others as you do yourself” “Harm none.”)
I am an Agnostic Pagan. I don’t really believe in anything. I am very eclectic (means I choose things of a spiritual nature and apply them to my life.) I desire to believe in a sentience that had created the universe and that there is purpose set for every life.
(My personal problem with religion (which includes Christianity) from what I understand is most of it deems Humanity as inherently evil striving to be good. (I am not saying that humanity hasn’t done evil.) I believe that Humanity is inherently good and we learn evil through misunderstanding & misery. Fear then feed the evil. It all boils down to acceptance & rejection. Do you accept the good within yourself or reject it? I believe in every human is good. Yet we have the ability to reject our nature which is the good within us.)
The reason I’ve chosen to head towards Paganism is that it reveres Nature and nurtures logic & reason towards it whether one believes in Theism or does not. (Since we are a part of nature & can see nature both in its physical & spiritual form. It makes sense to me if I lean towards Theism that I would choose something from this vast smorgastboard of philosophies.) Mainly what appeals to me is the message of accepting yourself to accept others. It doesn’t vilify Humanity for being human.)
What I believe & strive for is a similar standard of principals. I seek to wholey accept myself while treating others in a manner that I would want to be treated. (There have been times I am a hypocrite I am sorry to say.) That the world would accept me. (At the same time I hate to feel helpless or powerless (a victim if you will). So this is why I chosen Paganism becomes you’ve a choice of both Dependency & Independency.)
Yet at the end of the day it is all about what you accept & what you reject. (I only speak from my perspective) If you accept who you are then most likely people in general will accept you. (Those that don’t won’t bother you because they haven’t made a proper choice on whether they know themselves and in a way are lost and that fear make them reject you.)