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Annoyed af at a friend - I must have bottled it. TW cursing heh

greetings friends

I have a friend who is an annoying prick any time I mention dnd in our conversations, because she REALLY wants to play. Mind you, I play in person now and I am 2k miles away. What are more direct ways of telling her to look online for a group or go to the library and figure it out (because I think the public library could probably help?)? she never listens when i say that and just continues to be a cunty prick

as you can tell, it is clearly irritating the hell out of me

and to be quite honest and a little bitchy on my end, she probably wouldn’t even be a good player. (sometimes I think she could DM, but I also doubt she would want to hear that…) but that may also be me being annoyed as hell.

I suppose I can direct her to specific subreddits, and there are ex-friends of mine that I believe she is still friends with that she could ask about it. But for some reason she just wants to whine about it to me every time I bring it up??? it’s not even like I’m bragging. I think the last time I mentioned it was me saying I have friends now because I was invited to a group and/or our past session was cancelled, so I didn’t get to see them. I don’t even talk to her about my lovely characters.

Should I just straight up tell her it bothers me that she always brings this up whenever I mention DND? because it really bothers me, and makes me feel like i can’t have hobbies that she doesn’t have. (Speaking of, she does have hobbies I don’t, like sewing.)

This is a little ranty, but I could use another opinion because I am so frustrated over it.


Tell her how you feel, but you can also help her get started like you said. She probably doesn’t even know she is annoying you, because you’ve internalized it. Think of all of the stress and anger you could avoid by just talking to her and being honest.

I would make sure you’re calm first tho, going in irritated and angry won’t be pretty.

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I’m so proud of you for asking for a second opinion! that’s honestly amazing.

It could be you’re both not saying all that you feel/think on the matter. Maybe you’re the one she wants to play with, maybe she really is clueless and doesn’t know how to go about it, could be a lot of reasons she behaves like this when you mention your games. It could even be that she only talks abt dnd when you talk about it, but she doesnt have any games to share as yet.

I like @Lizzy 's advice.
I would add to it: make a list for her.
It sounds like she is a bit overwhelmed herself and not able or willing to look up the resources. So, you could make a list of subreddits, the library, etc, and that way she has a practical list of things she can do to get her dnd energy out. And certainly, if she’s concerned about playing with strangers, have her make a social media post asking who’s playing and if she can join in!

(Also, there was some creative cursing in that post, made me chuckle a tiny bit at some new phrases! )