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Belongs to: HeartSupport_Fans Content #326
Anything to support mental health is incredibly special to me. I feel like I am mental illness personified. I have always struggled with depression and anxiety . I have a long history of self harm and addiction. Today I have over 9 years clean… and there was a time where I didn’t ever think I could get clean… or even live long enough to be where I am today. I still struggle daily with body dysmorphia, manic depression, and social anxiety. Though I still struggle I can honestly say that it does get better. In my youth, everything felt permanent and inescapable. I let every mistake define me. I didn’t care about anything. Didn’t care about myself, my choices , the consequences… I tore myself apart. I was on a extremely toxic self destructive path. Today, I can’t imagine letting anyone or anything get me to that point. I have always badly struggled with my appearance and self image and still do. But there was a time that I allowed myself to be fully codependent on relationships and drugs. Aside from my mental struggles, I dealt with a lot of trauma at a young age, which made things so much harder for me. One of my biggest struggles is dealing with the regret. It’s hard to not feel like you’ve ruined your life … always wishing “why could I just be normal” … “why couldn’t I have just had a normal family “ …some days are harder than others… but I try to focus on the positives that came from the negatives in my life. One quote that always stuck with me that helped me the most was “today is yesterday’s unimaginable future”. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt like I couldn’t live or bear the pain of my experiences… but life goes on… and in spite of the hell that i went through… I’m still here
Hi Friend, I have the same type of history and I’m so proud of you for being clean for 9yrs! I’m so happy that you’re realizing that things can get better. There are a lot of people who don’t see it, so it’s good that you do. I think asking the question of why me is something most of us do and I’ve learned to step away from that thinking and try to go to therapy and learn about my self so I can get better. Thank you for sharing your story! ~Mystrose
I love this post a lot. Congratulations on 9 years! That is amazing. Addiction can become such a cruel disease, and I know that you say you hold guilt for not leading a “normal” life, but life doesn’t always give people the easy road. I’ve only accepted help and healing this last year myself. What is incredible is that you have picked yourself up and dusted yourself off and made the journey to find your better tomorrow. You’ve got this!
Hi Friend, Thank you so much for this post. 9 years is incredible and you should be so very proud of how far you have come. When you look back, look back on the work you have done, the distance you have travelled and the bumps in the road you have hit and still kept going - that is what you have achieved. You strength and stamina will indeed show others that they too can be where you are and be clean and live a better life. Please dont look back with regrets, look forward with hope. You are amazing. Much Love Lisa. x
Thank you so much for reaching out to this community. Your story is very encouraging. I love that you are able to look at things that have occurred in your life and see that there can be a positive even when it feels like everything is negative. I think it’s important to look for joy and to seek what’s good. There’s a lesson to be learned in every struggle. And this brings me to your mention of regret. It’s so easy to look at the past as time wasted. I don’t think we can waste time. Even in times of difficulty or hardship, we can still learn. Learning is a lifelong journey. I am so happy that you’re able to find lessons in the past. I wish you nothing but success and happiness for your future.
thank you so much for your post, that shows a lot of heart. that shows how strong you are, from where you have
started and where are you now. this is pure hope for everyone out there.
you can be so proud of yourself, be sure we are, you have overcome so many things and you are 9 years clean.
i can only imagine how hard this is. you show the world that it is possible to see the beauty in this life, the good
things that matter. when it comes to quotes “be grateful for today, because tomorrow isn’t granted for anybody”
this is what you stand for.
you are loved and you deserve all of that my friend. thank you and feel hugged.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. 9 years clean is a huge accomplishment. Wow!! Reading about all you have been through and worked through gives others of us encouragement that progress can be made and healing can happen. You have obviously done a lot of hard work to get to where you are at. You say that you still struggle with regret. Please don’t beat yourself up - look at how far you have come and what you have achieved. I’ve been reminded more than once that I can’t change what is in my past, but I can start right now and change what is in my future. And I’ve found that freeing. Again, thank you for sharing your story my friend. You are amazing and you make the world a better place.