This is a topic from YOUTUBE. Reply as normal, and we will post it to the user on YouTube.
Belongs to: Therapist reacts to Stinkfist by Tool
As an addict, i am never really looking for any specific ‘thing.’ I am always looking to change the way i feel now. If i feel good, i want to feel better. Then from better to best. But as Alan Watts points out, an increase in one degree has a change in the similiar degree on the flip side. If i go on a 2 week relapse run, it always increases my pain on the other side.
So now, the challenge is to be ok being uncomfortable. As an addict, i hate it.
1 Like
Hey there, thank you for your honesty and for sharing part of your story. That takes more courage than a lot of people know, so thank you. And I can relate to your feelings of always pursuing the next best feeling, never being content with how you are now. In my own struggles I have felt that weight so often, and it has told me that I am never happy enough or at peace enough to feel good about myself. That is SUCH a heavy burden to carry around, so I want you to know that I see you, I understand where you’re coming from, and you are not alone in this fight.
Addiction is a cruel monster, and in order to break it we need to be comfortable with being uncomfortable, as you mentioned. But wow, that feels like an oxymoron, right?! It goes against everything our bodies want. It’s such a hard battle to fight addiction, because it’s SO MUCH easier to just give in. Addiction tells us that we are never enough as we are, and that our joy is never enough as it is. But what if I told you that you are loved eternally and that there is hope beyond this addiction that sees you exactly as you are right now and loves you for who you are. That voice of hope might feel weak compared to the voices of addiction, but I promise you that it is infinitely more powerful and unconditional. For me, clinging to those things in life that matter the most to me is what helps me keep fighting. Holding fast to the people I love, to the promise of a future free from addiction, and to the love of the God who saves me.
Whatever you believe, I know that this addiction is not the most powerful thing watching over you. It might tell you that, but it’s not true. You were made to feel joy and peace exactly as you are, no matter what your situation looks like. So wherever you are when you read this, I want you to know that you are not alone, you are loved beyond comprehension, and you DO have the power to overcome this addiction. Yes, it will be hard, and yes, it will be painful. But cling to the simple fact that it is possible, and day by day, the voices of hope will grow louder than the voices of addiction. Thank you for reaching out, friend. You are in my thoughts and prayers right now.
1 Like
@@HeartSupport Thank you for such a heartfelt reply. I agree with what you say. All the intangible virtues that I find I find in other people. If I avail myself to all the grace (daily meetings, therapy, step work,etc), I receive that grace. My story is like many others. One of the hardest things when I started out on an 8 yr journey, was finding out I didn’t really know who I was. I started using at age 13…heavily at 17. I’m now 55. I was a 12 yo emotionally. Bi polar doest help. Thank you again for the helping hand.