Hey @porridgeprincess, thank you for your reply
I’m glad to know for the therapy! And I understand why it could be scary to share your feelings with your therapist. It may take some time to do that. The relationship you have with your therapist will always be unique so, yeah, he’s paid for the appointments, but it’s still a human-human thing. So we get to know each other, to trust each other step by step. It’s not acquired from the start. And it can be even more difficult when you’ve never been used to reveal yourself, to be vulnerable in front of someone.
But really, don’t let the idea that you may disturb others stop you. You are human, you have feelings, emotions, joys and sorrows, like all of us. Therapy is a place where you can cry, laugh and say anything you want. It’s a safe place, where you can afford to be offensive. And the fact that you’re afraid of being offensive makes me think that it’s unlikely to happen. It seems that you want to do the right things, for yourself, but also for others.
I also understand what you mean about others saying “you feel better already, so move on”. I think it’s something that can be encountered in many situations, not exclusively in relation to ADD. Especially for all mental health issues, because these are not visible things for others… but yet it’s there. I myself particularly experienced this with grief. It was quite odd because people tend to think that the pain is gone since X months or years have passed, since you smiled or resumed your work. Except that we still live with the pain and sometimes it’s still so crippling. So we adapt ourselves with the situation, but it doesn’t disappear.
ADD and ADHD are indeed very different. I know these things only partially, and from the outside, but I also remember being shocked to see how many resources there are for parents/children, and not adults. I understand why, we get to diagnose these things more and more earlier in life and, if not, it can impact your personal development. But I also think that there’s indeed a lack of informations in this area.
Also, if the others’ experiences can be interesting for comparison, I want to emphasize the fact that you remain unique in your existence, through your personality and through your actions. The diagnosis is indeed really helpful because it brings you a better understanding of yourself, to think new ways of acting. But fortunately ADD doesn’t summarize who you are. Maybe there are people with ADHD who feel unable to travel or go to parties like your friends. So, this is only my personal opinion but I think it’s a form of identity to recreate. There’s a time of upheaval after you receive a diagnosis. It may feel like it’s taking up all of your personal space. But then, over time, by knowing better and better ADD and by working on it, you’ll manage to emancipate yourself.
That’s also great to know for the headphones! Gotta say when I was at work I used to have a pair of headphones (I was allowed to) because I’m personnaly unable to focus on something if there’s noise around me. I am a bit too sensitive to my environment (sound, smells, tastes…). But fortunately we live in a time when there are many tools at our disposal to make life more pleasant.