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Back to feeling useless and unimportant!

Hi heart support friends,
It’s me again.
I kind of think that I am better and then something happens and makes me feel so hopeless with myself.
It is so hard to struggle every time with a disease in my body and also with lots of insecurities.
I kind of went back to talk with this guy who I like and also is a great guy, or that’s what I thought.
He is playing with my feelings, just writes to me when he is not talking to his other chic.
I kind of fell for him, and I feel so stupid right now. Back at his game!
He is now again talking to her and I feel so horrible, ugly and even my eating disorders kind of cake back!

I can’t help it!! I feel so miserable.
I am no where near to be the one to make someone happy, it’s like this circles comes over and over again!!!

Thank you for letting me express all I feel, and thanks in advance for reading this!

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I’m new here. Untrustworthy as hell, especially with anyone’s stories. But I feel compelled to ask since you mentioned, ( it’s me again ) if this helps you here?
Obviously feeling free to vent it out helps. I’ve tried several other sites comparable to this one, read some brutal stories, completely valid and honest, replied to empty responses. Braved out my own reduced version story that simply felt cheated for no support.
How can he be a great guy? How can happiness be the end goal? Where is yours?
Noone is perfect, so ridiculously far from it in fact to even trying to claim some decency feels absurd.
I’ve played tug o war with myself so much I’m frayed and splitting apart. Not to mention the effect I have on those closest.
It’s hard to not have. When you want.
I’m sorry if this doesnt make sense. Hope

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