The one thing motivating to move forward in life is that possibility of full self expression. I’m kinda like the black sheep of the family, literally.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE dark themes. Goth and horror all the way. And if I have the chance to decorate something in eyeballs, i will do it lol
I don’t really think its possible to do or dress the way i want mostly because I live in a Christian community. I’ve found it’s not really a religion I want to practice but I respect my family and their beliefs. I always join them in prayer when we have family get togethers.
The only people I know aren’t Christians are my dad and my brother. So my dad usually supports me when it comes to this stuff.
I think I remember in my sophomore year. I bought gothic clothes online and put them together to make an outfit. I was so happy, but I only got to wear it out twice before my mother decided that it was too much lol. My dad could only do so much to back me up.
I do most of my self expression online, where I can make digital art collages, listen to music, etc. And I have like a little horror themed wall collage at my desk in my room. My mom just kinda accepts it because at least its my room and people don’t go in there. I wanted to add more photos but the printer is currently broken, rip
But I long for the day I get to strut down the sidewalk in demonia boots, with a set of clothes that I actually like. I look forward to a living in a space filled with things I love and enjoy.