Saturday at a birthday party at a bar. There were few people I knew so I was uncomfortable in that busy of a social situation. I’ve always been a shy person but it’s seems like it’s been getting worse in social settings. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I always try to go in with a good mindset beforehand but once I get there I basically shut down and basically cling to the person I know best. But then that makes me feel like I’m bothering them. Every bit social setting I get into it’s always the same outcome…me leaving early/making an excuse to leave
I have this issue as well but have slowly become better at socializing. I would ask the friend I’d cling on to try to introduce me to people and ask questions I may already know the answer to like how do you guys know each other etc. One of my professors always says just fake it till you make it. Even if you have to fake being confident and social it will work out. Fake it so you can have some practice. Ask basic questions and try to find something in common so you’re not hating it too much.
First of all, thank you for sharing. It isn’t always easy.
Second of all, social settings can be difficult and overwhelming. Your response to them is so common. Heck, I know I’ve also clung to the people I know, because it’s easier than opening up to someone new, even on a basic level.
It sounds to me like you keep trying, and I’m proud of you for that. It isn’t easy, but working at getting comfortable in those situations when you feel strong enough to does help - kind of like a “practice makes perfect” thing.
And I’m sure you’re worried about bothering your friends when you need them, but you probably also are more than happy to help them when they are worried that they’re bothering you. Friendship is a two-way street, and I would bet they don’t mind at all.
Basically, what I’m trying to say is, I’m proud of you. Keep trying. It’s okay to not feel okay, you’re only human. And get back out there when you feel you can. Love you, friend.
<3 AnitaBandaid
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Thanks so much for being so open and reaching out to Heart Support. I took some time to respond to your message along with my community here:
Much love
clairepics
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