College rejection

I literally put my best foot forward in my college application and have gotten rejected by literally every school. I’m an international student and from a pour background. I’ll probably tell my family that I got rejected and be told “I knew it”. All my friends are getting into harvard, Princeton and what not and I couldn’t even get into one college. I want to self harm or kill myself but what will that help me with. All my dreams are shattered. The sorries are becoming too many and I feel worse than trash. I regret being born​:persevere::persevere::persevere:. Life is so difficult. I can’t apply to a community college cause those don’t exist in my country.
However, it’s all my fault. I’ve never been good enough for anything. I worked so hard in high school and now I’m nothing. I feel like my sanity is slipping away.

Will it get better? I can’t sleep. It’s hard getring myself to eat.

I need help​:sob::sob::sob:

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You are good enough :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts:. ily baby everything will get better trust me. i know the feeling something similar happened to me today.

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If it is any consolation I was rejected or waitlisted at nearly every PA School I applied to. It sucks, it hurts, I felt discouraged that I failed and that I am a giant loser. Despite this I have a chance to apply again in late April and in the meantime am able to work in healthcare and education as I get ready to apply again. I have no guarantee that the second time I apply I will get an acceptance letter but I still need to try. Are there any universities you can still apply to weather it is in the states or in your country? Is there anything you can do as far as work that pertains to what you would like to study? I want you to know that being rejected is a setback it does not define you, you define you. No matter what keep fighting and make your goals a reality. If you need to take a rest, process what you are going through that is completely okay but don’t give up. You are going to be okay and everyone here at Heartsupport is here to support and cheer you on every step of the way.

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I received a few waitlists, two from ivies​:joy::joy::joy:, I was excited but I quickly remembered that no one gets off the dartmouth and yale waitlists. I applied to 19 schools to get into none. Sleepless nights from November to January just writing new essays every now and then. Only to get this many rejections. I know I sound whiny but the fact that all my friends got into ivy leagues and not just any other school doesn’t make it any better. I feel hopeless and idk whether I should just quit school in its whole entirety. How do I face the people who I so excitedly told that I applied to schools in the US. How do I continue with my life with this burden in my heart. I hope this sadness transforms into a will to become successful and not accepting any drawbacks and anyways life must continue. I’m used to being the emotionless person who’s been through so much that I’m numb. Being a gay person in Africa sure isn’t a blast and I was praying for a school in the US to escape all this pressure. I guess now I can be content. I’ve cried 2 days straight and I never cry. My friends try to make me feel better but they just remind me what a piece of shit I am. My family really doesn’t care and would prefer I studies in the country. I would try to kill myself but our house is too small I would probably be caught in the act. What hurts more is the money I used on the whole application process keeping in mind that I come from a poor background. I wish I could vent but all my friends wouldn’t understand now I just have to wallow in this land of uncertainty. Thanks heartsupport for this platform. I wish I could take some time off from my body or just do sth that takes my mind off things. But I’m at home and idle and that just helps etch in how worthless I am. Some times I wonder if God just placed me here as a control experiment for my peers. If I wrote this on whatsapp I would add laughing emojis but Im most probably crying. I hate life, love and goals.

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