I just had a crazy evening and I don’t know what to do. I went over to Emma’s (who is my ex) and I’ve been staying at her place here and there because it’s getting cold outside. But a few weeks ago I told her if she doesn’t cut out these bad friends she has I’ll never see her again, and that was 2 weeks ago. Then a notification comes up while we are hanging out and she lies to me about it and who it was. I see her texts showing she lied and it was her bad friends. The thing is I told her weeks ago that if she had anything to do with the friends that were doing drugs and were doing Coke and heroin that we are done. I have been out of the army for a relatively short time and have no family or anyone really that can provide or help me financially, so I have to be very picky about who I’m around. And if she had anything to do with these people it would put me at risk. So 2 weeks ago I told her if she has anything, and I mean remotely anything to do with them we’re done and that I will never see her again. So we’re just hanging out and she gets a notification from that whole friend group and I found out she lied to me and all this and I wanted to leave and she wouldn’t let me. She shoved me up against the wall and fucking started shoving me and pushing me and trying to keep me there and getting more and more aggressive. Anyone who knows me knows I would never hit a woman under ANY circumstance, I don’t care what it is. So in summary she basically beat up on me. And when I put my jacket on to leave she went completely crazy and punched a hole in her door and she started acting erratic. She started showing a lot of behaviors my mother and my father had when I was younger and having the same abusive red flags, doing essentially the same things they’ve done. I then said “Emma we’re done here, there is nothing more between us.” She then tried to shove me and throw me back again. I told her I would call the police if she wouldn’t let me leave. Then she started yelling and screaming and I said if she put her hands on me again I will press charges for assault and she said she’d tell the cops I was being violent. After I had the cops ready to be dialed she slams open the door and I walked out. I grabbed her keys to get my stuff out of her car and I started walking. I get my stuff and start walking home. She starts following me and I try to evade her and get away. I walk down the street and she follows more and more. Then the cops pull up, her roommate called the police because she thought I hit her or something; but thankfully Emma told the truth and told the cop that she was shoving me and she punched the door and all of that, and now she has a fucking swollen and bruised knuckle for busting the door. Who the hell does that? Why would anyone ever do something like that? That’s pure crazy. You’re just crazy if you do that or anything like it. Then the cops talked to me because she was too irate to speak. They said all right, ran my license and asked about my jacket and I told them about how I was just leaving the military and can’t associate with drugs or anyone who does. Then they told me they were gonna take me home and dropped me off at the place I Told them. I just don’t get why this stuff always happens to me. I don’t get why I can’t just get an apartment and not have to risk my reputation and/or safety to have somewhere to sleep. I don’t get why I can’t just have a normal life and not have to work 60-80 hours a week just to have a chance to even try to have a place to sleep. I don’t understand what is so bad that I’ve done in my life that warrants for all this. I don’t even know what to think anymore.
Omg I am so sorry for what your going through. May I ask can you rent a room somewhere until you can get back on your feet? I know what your going through I went through trauma 3 years ago. It’s difficult. But hang in there your a good man and God Loves You. If you need to talk inbox me please
First of all thank you so much for your service to our nation its people like you that protect all the rights most of us take for granted. abusive women are a thing and unfortunately under reported by husbands and boyfriends. I went to school for Law Enforcement and she definitely was using her actions to try and control you and im so sorry you had to deal with that. growing up in the environment you did may dray crazy women to you but you will be able to see through them and when you get the sense that they may hurt you just say not to a relationship because your worth so much more that a negative one-sided relationship. I also understand the 60 hour work week to live ins insane and unreal my suggestion is could you split rent with a friend that’s positive for you to be around that is not going to use you or hurt you maybe a Army buddy that just got out? hang in their Sir im sure you will find a good woman that wont hurt you in the future. id also suggest a small vacation to relax and just take care of yourself. always remember your a real hero and your worth it.