Crushing on Straight Dudes

As a gay man, I’m way too old to be constantly infatuated with straight guys. I don’t know if it’s some antiquated idea of “conquest” that I get from being with “straight” guys or if it’s some internalized homophobia or because I know it will only lead to me getting hurt because my feelings won’t be reciprocated. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do anymore.

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By being with. Do you mean just hanging out, or more? I would say they are not so heterosexual if they are into more than just chilling. I am a heterosexual man and I absolutely love my gay friends to death. I feel bad when they have crushes on me, because I perhaps don’t always set super clear boundaries. So it may not always be just you to blame for your hurt feelings. Sometimes boundaries aren’t set the best. Anyways, I don’t think you should necessarily be upset with yourself for having feelings or attraction to any person. I think that having your feelings, and understanding boundaries you should set for yourself, are two different things. If that makes sense? Like, you’re allowed to feel something. But understanding that something is unhealthy and trying to cope and understand it, I think is maybe where things could improve? I don’t know. I’m just here to talk. I’m no professional

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hey @vulture

Your feelings are valid for being infatuated with straight guys and it does hurt allot when your feelings are not reciprocated in some fashion by someone. As a fellow in the same position i recommend not to give up hope and be normal, there is a difference between wanting to get to know someone and flirting purposely.

Wanting to be accepted by someone and seen means something to all of us.

Keep reaching out. I get you friend


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