and low key hoping that it happens just so it will stop. im so tired of sitting here feeling like im dying. im so over the shortness of breath the hyper focusing im so tired of life literally feeling fake like im just on autopilot or witnessing my life happen through someone elses life while mentally still being aware that im me and that im in control. im currently whats happening is i feel like i cant breathe. it literally feels like someone is sitting on my chest. but i cant do anything about it. what if it really is a heart attack what if im really dying and i cant do anything about it? im not insured. i cant afford an ambulance or a doctors visit i cant afford to see a doctor for meds nor afford the meds. why? because im so panicky all the time that i cant even work. i literally sit here at the age of 24 and rot. and its terrible. theres no quality of life and honestly just feels like its not worth it. im not going to hurt myself or anything but low key i hope it does just happen i hope that whatever im fearing would just happen so it would be done and over with instead of suffering all the time feeling that feeling of existential dread or impending doom.
Hey there! I’m sorry that you’re going through some stuff right now, but it doesn’t have to feel like this! I understand the panic feeling and feeling like you cant breathe. I felt that way a few years ago when I didn’t have health insurance, but there are resources available online for that! I wasn’t able to pay for therapy sessions, but I searched for free therapist here and there are plenty of them available in my area, as I’m sure there are where you live too!