My lifelong friends depression and anxiety have returned to my life. Quick backstory: I’ve moved back to my home country less than a year ago, and my life standards changed a lot since then. I lived in a safer, more liberal country where living standards are far better but had to return because I couldn’t find a job. And well, I’ve never enjoyed living here. (Add some trauma here and there to spice things up, but let’s not get to that today.)
Fast forward 10 months, now I am home and work my first corporate job (~9 mo). Recently my performance at work has been taking a fall; this week two mistakes came up (one recent, one from months ago) which were not that major according to my manager, but really infuriated our clients.
I have apologised immediately and corrected my mistakes. I also spoke to my manager and apologised to him as well. He said it was human to make mistakes and that we both should pay more attention in the future.
I feel bad about causing unnecessary and preventable stress to my manager (we have great relationship), as this also affects his performance and career. I am also worried about how it might affect my career. A colleague who has more experience than I, is now being re-evaluated at work due to repeating mistakes and complaint from clients. So I am worried about being in the same position.
So my anxiety is now peaked, I know that I did what I could by owning my mistake as an immediate response. And need to work on working slower and paying more attention to details.
I know it is human to make mistakes but can’t help but feel like I messed up big time. I just need to be able to shake it off and work on solutions, but I am a bit lost in my anxiety and sense of guilt at the moment.
Hi Nev,
welcome to Heart Support, thank you so much for sharing this.
mistakes are human, they can happen. your manager said this to you, you are aware of that, what is great.
see it as learning. in some cultures, there are not failures, there are no mistakes, there is learning. next time you do
better, you now know what you have to look at. you apologized for what you have done wrong, that is also a huge step, not many people would do. you admit that, that shows courage.
from my experience, when it comes to work, we are no machines. in times of trouble, or stress it can and it will happen. it is hard to go on without having self doubts. some can, some not. i am also bad with it.
is there something you could adjust at work ? like a to do list when it comes to your tasks ?
some little adjustments can have a big impact in the end. small steps matter most.
you are loved my friend, you matter most. feel hugged
When anxiety takes over it becomes hard to hear the voice of reason. But it always help to hear them from someone else.
My mistakes were attention slips due to rushing to meet deadlines. I will try to work at a slower pace, double, triple check my work until some things come automatically. Maybe I can talk to my manager to see if he thinks I can do more/differently to avoid such mistakes.
Thanks for the hug, too! Was exactly what I needed
We all suffer from fear of messing up at work. It sounds like you have a great boss. You and he both know mistakes happen. What’s important is that you caught them, corrected them, and learned from them. The key word in what you said about your coworker is repeating mistakes and complaints, meaning he’s not learning. I like to say that if I put a price tag on my mistakes at work it would be tens of thousands of dollars, but I’ve never made the same mistake twice. Of course I don’t enjoy making mistakes, but each one is a powerful teacher.
As for your customers, they’re less understanding, but put yourself in their shoes. If your cell phone company bills you the wrong amount because of simple human error, you’d be upset too because it’s their job to get it right. As long as they make it right, you can move on. Eventually you’ll forget about that time the phone company overcharged you, but the guy on the other end who made the mistake will hopefully never forget and will be way more careful in the future.
Lastly, remember that it’s in a company’s best interest to retrain their current employees. That’s why your coworker is being reevaluated instead of fired. If they fire him, they have to pay unemployment, then they have to take time or potentially hire recruiters to fill his position, then they have to take time to train the new person, which is bad for productivity across the board. Eventually they could fire him, but it’s in everyone’s best interest if they can successfully retrain him instead. Keep that in mind, especially with a good understanding boss. Your job is not in danger.
Now get out there, make a mistake, and learn something!
it helps to sometimes take step back, or take some time to slow down and overlook everything.
i did also too many mistakes because i was too pressured or too fast with my work. sometimes to sort your things,
manage them and collect thoughts and everything helps more and in the end you might have more time for the
next things that are coming up. you will do great, i am sure. you are really self aware, from what you share.
anxiety added to that, is bullshit for the mind. us start doubting more and more and more.
all you have to do is breathe friend.
I took a deep breath after reading your message, and realised I have been holding it since.
Thank you for putting things into perspective. I don’t know what it was exactly but it made my shoulders relax.
I will try to take a moment to gather my thoughts, calm my mind and take the next step. I just need to work on finding a way on silencing my nagging anxiety and sense of guilt first.
I will return to your message whenever it gets hard. Thank you
feel hugged
