Dont know what to do with my life/rant

I honestly don’t know what to do with myself or my life anymore. I feel like such a waste of space, like I don’t matter, I’m annoying, useless, and just shouldn’t even talk. every time I open my mouth, I regret it. I don’t deserve to have anyone around me.
My Career Creativity professor makes me feel like absolute garbage. The whole point of the class is for the students to enhance their creativity, but the professor only wants the students to see creativity through his eyes. We come up with such cool and interesting things, put effort into them, and build up enough courage to show him what we’ve made, and when we do that, he immediately tells us we’re doing it wrong. I don’t understand what he’s trying to say or accomplish, but it’s so frustrating when you can’t even create what you want, and are forced to think of things to make that will only please him, and even then its so difficult. He doesn’t give us any direction, is so vague about every assignment, and expects us to create something spectacular. I can’t keep doing this. He has totally ruined my mindset of what art and creativity is supposed to be, and has made me even more self conscious about what I make. I keep trying, and I keep getting knocked down.
Now I’m questioning if I’m doing the right major. if im doing the right thing. I dont know what to do I feel so lost and like a waste of space.

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@nicole_kaley
First I am so sorry that you are feeling all of this and that is coming too this state of mind for you. Second thank you for sharing with us I would like to touch on a few things that you shared.

On this point no one knows what entirely to do with themselves it is impossible to know every minute of everything in our lives. I will say this it is okay to not have every answer but it is important to keep trying at something that might not first work out you need to try again and again to make it work. It might seem impossible but dont give up.

That is not right. I will say that a teacher believes they know best and sadly that is what makes it really hard when that teacher as a view unlike your own. I will say this sadly it is hard to get others to see it your way if they are stuck in their way. But know that that does not change how creative you are. I know that is hard.

You are not lost if this is not the right major for you that is okay to change. I changed in the middle of my own schooling just see what fits you.

You are not a waste of space what so ever. Do not believe that whatsoever. Lies come all the time in my own life because of anxiety and I have to work hard to stop those thoughts. So friend I want you to challenge those thoughts when they come I have started doing where I literally ask myself is this truth and than if so who said it etc… breaking down the lie till I get to the bottom of it.

I know that is hard but you can do this. I believe in you.

Hold fast,
Ash