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Embarrassed to be alive

I’ve lived with chronic mental illness for most of my life & am mostly housebound because of how severe my symptoms are and a lack of services in my area.

I keep reaching out and begging people for help even though it mostly just hurts me. I called the crisis hotline twice today. They told me to keep calling if I wanted to talk. It made me feel happy that I have somewhere to reach out to and sad too that I don’t have any friends or family to talk to instead.

I feel really tired and desperate and far away from everybody else.

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@Rabbits

Thank you so much for sharing and being here. It’s not an easy thing to accept to be vulnerable but you did it. :heart: This community is a safe place and you can come here anytime you need.

I see you friend. And I hear your exhaustion. Living with chronic illnesses is tough and requires a lot of energy on a daily basis. You are strong, but you have the right to reach out, to ask for help and you did the right thing by doing so. I’m glad to hear that you called the crisis line. People there are doing an amazing job and it feels great to know that this is a resource you can use every time you need.

Even though you don’t have a family or friends that could be there for you physically, you are not alone friend. This community is now another resource available to you anytime. And you’ve got friends right here. I’ve personnaly met wonderful people here who helped me to feel less alone while I was struggling, so I can only wish you the same. :heart:

Even though you have to deal with heavy obstacles in your life, you can still find growth in all of that. Sometimes it comes from fighting and looking forward. But other times it means to slow down and take some rest. Being tired is okay friend. It doesn’t diminish the fact that you are brave and strong. We don’t know each other, but just by reading you I can say that I’m proud of you. Because you’re here, you share about some intimate things and you’re honest about that.

There is no illness on earth that defines you, even chronic ones. You are more than a diagnosis or a list of symptoms. It might take a lot of space in your life, but it will never question your own worth. You are a unique person and you are entirely part of this world. I’m sorry you feel embarassed to be alive. I’ve been dealing myself with that feeling for a very long time and I know it hurts. But you have the right to live and to exist no matter what. Because you are you and you are beautiful just as you are.

Feel free to join us on Discord : https://discord.gg/vkQdYT or stop by on Twitch during live streams: twitch.tv/heartsupport It would be awesome to see you there! :wink:

Sending hugs your way. :heart: