I feel as though I am so ugly, and fat and I will never not think that I am not ugly or fat
Body image is something I’ve struggled with too for a long time. Whenever those thoughts come in your head, look in the mirror and say a few positive affirmations like “I am beautiful, I am loved, I matter”. Because those are truths. “I’m ugly” or “I’m fat” are lies and they do not define you, don’t let them.
Hang in there.
I relate so much. I think the most important thing to remember is that you are more than your weight or looks. You may never be convinced that you are the most physically attractive person, but you don’t need to be. You should be accepted and loved, not for your looks, but for your inherent value. Whether you know it or not, you are important. I know that appearances are prioritized by the media, but appearances don’t make a person good or bad. If your view of yourself is damaging your self esteem, you need to check with friends and family and other people who care about you. They can tell you the good things they see in you and encourage you to see yourself the same way. Things might not change quickly, but eventually they will change.