Everyone would benefit from my own death

I’m Heather and I’m new so please bare with me as I jumble all this out.

Over the past two years has been nothing but pain and endless trauma. My family has split up, I move just about every other month. I’m always sleeping on other people’s couches but pretty soon, I’m not going to have that couch.
I’m 20 and I still don’t drive. I’ve never had money for a car on account of trying to take care of my mom and little sister (my mom doesn’t work). My step-dad has abused me since I was 7 so I avoid him at all costs.
The only good thing is that I was hired today at a dollar store so I have just a shred of hope to start making some money but I’m so tired.
I have no friends at all, no one hangs out with me, there is no one to talk to, and I’m stuck in a toxic situation with the person I am currently living with. Everything would be better off without me because my mom would just have to focus on my sister. I wouldn’t be moving into someone else’s house every month. I wouldn’t have to worry about a job or cars or anything. No one would even miss me.
Now don’t get me wrong, I try to take care of myself. I go to therapy and I take my medications the way I’m supposed to. I’ve been hospitalized twice. It doesn’t matter what I do, it just won’t get any better.
I’m at an end here.

I’m new to this but I want say I’m sorry you were hurt like that. I will keep you in my prayers as best I can. I know God is bigger and can help you and hopefully me as well. Hang in there.

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Hey heatherliz!! I promise you it will always get better. It already has bc you got a job at the dollar store. I understand your situation very well. I know its hard living fron couch to couch but you have plenty of ppl who love you.

Your mom and sister would def not benefit from you not being here anymore. It wouldn’t make anything better for them at all. They would be lost without you.

Im so proud of you for reaching out here. You are not alone. I know one of us has been through this and can relate.

Love
Charrabeans

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You too. You’re in my thoughts.

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