Everything just falling apart

I feel like everything is falling apart all around me, anytime I try to do something for myself it just falls apart and fails.

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Hi @lonelyfreak

I’m sorry you’re having a hard time. If you feel comfortable, we can talk about what you’re having trouble with. I’m here.

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I’m having trouble with my whole life.

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What is troubling you the most?

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Hey @lonelyfreak Im sorry too that you are feeling like this, sometimes we get so overwhelmed that the whole world feels like its crashing in and absolutely nothing you do can fix that and the only way to even begin to look at it is to break it down bit by bit, As @Mystrose says what is the thing that is giving you the most upset right now? maybe if you talk about that it would be a start to making things a little better.
Much Love Lisa. xx

I don’t even know where to start first.

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its ok, when I feel like that I get a clear page and just writie what is going on in my head, it doesn have to make sense certainly not at the start, like journalling you just write all the thoughts down, I tend to write in list form so i can move things around, eventually you find some order in the chaos. Or you can just write on here what your thoughts are and we can help to put them in some order with you? its entirely up to you friend. xx

I guess one of the main things it that I’m soon to be 29, and I’ve never been in any sort relationship.

ok, I can understand that is something that is a concern, to be fair the last two years you have not really had the chance to be out and having the opportunity to meet anyone new in order to have a relationship so thats really tough but before that, was there a reason you didnt meet anyone? I didnt meet anyone until i was in my 20s as I was always so nervous talking to people, I was a nervous wreck. Do you struggle getting to know people?

yeah I’m super shy and self conscious about my appearance I don’t know how to talk to people.

I do understand that, I used to go along to a party and hide in a spare room and listen to everyone else having fun just desperate to go back home, I hated being around people, i had no confidence at all, I do feel for you because the only way to get that confidence is to practice by being with people, I dont mean go and put yourself in a big room of people but just literally baby steps which in a way is all you can do at the moment anyway due to restrictions so i guess that is in your favour, take a friend to a coffee shop, sit for a bit then acknowledge the people on the table next to you. It all takes time and practice and to be fair if you are not a bubbly outgoing person you probably never will be and thats ok but to be comfortable around others would be good and will give you the opportunity to meet someone and have a relationship. You have been held back the last two years but that is now improving. start taking those small steps. have some faith in yourself because belive me, just because you dont think you have much to offer, you will be surprised just how much you have to give. xx

I don’t have any real life friends.

ok, do you have any online friends that are possibly local enough to you that you could arrange to meet up with? if not maybe look up some online local groups that you could get involved with, that way you could get to know some people online before having to meet them irl if that is a worry for you?

I dont have online friends that live near me either and I have no idea if there is any sort of local online type thing.

There are solutions to this. You can google what is happening in your city and you will be surprised at what you find. There are church’s that have social events where you can meet other people if you are interested in that. There are clubs you join as well. There is a lot of stuff out there, you just have to make the choice to look for it.

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I would need a vehicle and license in order to do all that

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Just because you don’t drive doesn’t mean you can’t get out and do things. Call a cab, walk or ride a bike. Unless you get up and try to climb out of this dark hole you are in, you’re going to stay there.

welp I guess I’m stuck then and should just call it quits

Why would you say that? Is it impossible for you to do those things?

I live in a small town in fact it’s so small it’s actually classified as a village, there are no cabs here and you cant call to get one walking and rinding a bike would take hours to get into town