Everything sux

Idk what to do. I’m questioning my sexual orientation and missing a guy I used to love who goes to another school. I tried texting him today but I think he forgot about me or just doesn’t want to talk which I understand but really hurts. My friends have so much drama that they all lay on me. I feel like there is quite literally no point to life. Seriously… what is the point??? I’m not going to kill myself or anything, but I just wish I weren’t alive. Living sucks. Why do we have to do it? We’ll all die in the end anyway. I just want all of my problems and worries and feelings to go away

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Sorry to add another bit, but my friends have also made a “cute” nickname for me since my name is isabelle they call me isabitchell. I want to say something but my poor confrontational skills kinda prohibit me from doing anything. It really hurts my feelings. Like it was funny at first but now I’m just sick of it

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there’s so much out there in the world to explore, places to see, things to eat, people to meet. There’s also so much inside of you to explore, to see how your mind blossoms. There are new, better friends to meet, to share moments with, pets to meet and share your heart and home with!

It can get better, I’m sorry that your friends have made that name for you. You can tell them firmly that you don’t like it and want them to stop. Then stop answering them when they address you as such… People tend to get bored and move on eventually if we don’t react to their silly actions. If you ignore them, they may feel badly about it and stop. Worth a shot?

I hope you can find it in yourself to stand up for yourself. It doesn’t have to be a big confrontation, no raised voices etc. Just firmly say “I don’t like that, it’s not nice. Please stop. I’ll answer you when you call me by my name”.

Hoping the you find things that you love to do, things that are interesting and make the days a bit more fun and meaningful for you, friend.

Thanks you for being here with us and trusting us. Hope you feel safe and comfortable sharing with us.

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if your friends are making you stressed then you shouldn’t talk to them or tell them those stuff

From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hi Isabelle, thank you for your post. You seem to have a lot on your mind. The guy you loved that you texted I am sure he hasn’t forgotten you but maybe he was busy doing something and couldn’t get straight back to you and then forgot that you text him? That’s possible but if you were close there is no reason at all that he would have forgotten you. With regards to your sexual orientation, is there anyone that you can talk this over with? It is not something I personally can relate to but I can imagine it can be very upsetting if you have questions and uncertainty, so having a good friend or adult that can help you or talk openly to you would be very helpful. Isabelle you sound like such a lovely person with a huge heart but just because a person has a big heart does not mean they have to take on everyone’s troubles, there comes a point where you have to start to look after yourself and know that you matter as much as everyone else and you do. There are ways to talk to friends without being confrontational, maybe you could sit with your friends explain to them that you are having a hard time and that you could really do with their support right now please and the next time that name is used all you have to do is smile and say, that used to be funny but its actually a bit annoying now, can we just not use it anymore please. Life is worth living, your life is most definitely worth living and when people know your boundaries and things become clearer for you, you will see that light getting brighter. No one has the right to make you feel powerless or hurt your feelings, I wish I could have you write that down where you can see it all the time so all I can ask you to do is please remember it. Much Love Lisa. x

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From: ᏒᎧᏕᎥᏋ

Hi @lov1 Thank you for posting and I’m sorry that you’re having confusion about your sexuality. I don’t know your circumstance, but I hope that you will see each experience as learning and not in a negative way. If you don’t feel good about something you’ve done (consensually) learn from it and try something else if it’s safe and consensual. I’m assuming you are young and for some people it takes a little while to figure out their sexual orientation. Be patient with yourself. It doesn’t sound like your friends are being very good friends, I’m not sure I would want to keep friends like that. We should surround ourselves with positive and supportive people. ~Mystrose

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From: eloquentpetrichor

Hello, Isabelle! It honestly sounds a bit like you need some new friends. If you do not feel able to tell them the nickname is not funny and they don’t understand that they should stop then maybe they aren’t very good friends in reality. As for the guy who didn’t respond: has he gotten back to you yet? He may have been busy. Midterms and school and whatnot. Life is busy and sometimes people cannot respond immediately. Don’t just give up if you like the friendship and it is a good one.

As for questioning your orientation I have quite a bit of experience in this area. First do you know about sexual versus romantic attraction and orientations? They are very different and can be different for everyone. You can be attracted physically to one or both genders but feel romantic attractions to different versions/combinations/etc. I was really confused when I didn’t know both existed. And while I know that having the right words to describe yourself is wonderful it’s important to recognise that everyone is unique in how they feel about all of it. Find the words that fit you best and that you relate to but don’t let those words define you or control your thoughts or actions in this part of life. Just trust your instincts and feelings.

When I was questioning I found it very helpful to go on reddit and join the subreddits for the various romantic and sexual orientations I was trying to understand. You tend to find a lot of helpful people with helpful insight and personal anecdotes about their own journeys to self-understanding. Just don’t stay too long or it can get toxic and make things worse and more confusing. I learned that the hard way.
I’m including a link that describes romantic v sexual attractions that helped me a lot: Asexuality, Attraction, and Romantic Orientation - LGBTQ Center

Good luck learning about yourself and talking to your friends :hrtlegolove:

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