Everything the same

[Shpdqw]

For a staff member, I’m not exactly sure which category to put this in. If a mod or SWAT leader could please put this in what they believe the category fits, that would be appreciated (delete this part as well).

First off, I’m doing a lot better mentally than when I first was when I joined HeartSupport. I’m just tired of my life.

Every day is the same. I get up at 6:40 AM every day before school, I get ready, I got to school, have my first block, then my second, third, and fourth. Depending on the day I may or may not have to film during lunch or after school. The times I film during lunch, I’m too socially awkward to try and ask others questions for broadcasting (word on the streets). During lunch, before it started raining, I used to go out on walks, and it wasn’t always the same. I would have a friend that I would go to a creek with, or a park, or a trail. We’d always make it back on time, but since it’s raining, I can’t go off campus without getting soaked. Everything is the same, and I can’t help but be sickened by it. As the days go by, It’s hard to count. I can never do anything new, I can’t go on walks, and I can’t get weight room workouts in during the school day because heaven forbid those are only available during flex blocks. Don’t get me wrong, I’m doing great in all of my classes (A average), I’m sick of the continuous loop, if that makes sense.

If you’ve read this nonsense of a rant, thank you. I apologize for taking up your time.

If you’re having a bad, please, take this hug:

Much love, Shadow<3
Stay safe, you are loved, always remember that.

[Aardvark]

Hi Shadow,
be sure that nothing is nonsense, when its in your mind and you feel like it, let it out, reach out, write it
down. no need to apologize or anything like that. you matter my friend !
i hope that you read this too, taking your time and thank you, i needed that hug today.
thank you not only for reaching out to us, also for letting us know how you been doing.
to let all out is a good first step. i know what you mean with feeling stuck in a loop.
my last years where like that.
getting up - morning routine - work - work - coming home - lunch - shower / some doing / - sleep
again and again. weekends mostly recovering. not doing anything. feeling isolated and down.
it is hard when your activities are reduced to time blocks or bound by breaks.
to do new activities or things, can cost a lot of energy and time to find, but it is worth a try.
not only going for a walk, try new stuff. keep your mind working.
maybe at your campus there are communities to join.
don’t push yourself, get comfortable and take one step a time.
writing helps a lot, helped me a lot. write everything down what comes to mind, all kind of stuff.
build up new routines maybe. it will be hard, it will take time, but you will feel better afterwards, when you
see your progress. i am sure you will, you sound like very aware of your doing.
you deserve happiness in every kind of form, feel loved my friend and have a wonderful day,
feel hugged back and enjoy time and keep reminding you, you deserve all good in this world.
Lovely Greetings

[Shpdqw]

Hello! I will take these into consideration, thank you for taking the time and reading what I have wrote. On the topic of the walks and stuff, it was more or less I felt a bit free. I was able to explore, and best of all I was doing it with my friends, one of whom is kind of new to the area of town, so we were both explored Gj a bit of it at a time. I’ve tried writing before, but I stopped it in case one of my parents found it one day.

Stay safe,
Shadow

[DiscordReply]

From: twixremix

hey shadow,

i remember my school days feeling like every day was a never-ending loop of all the days before too. i hope it stops raining soon though so you can explore more areas around you and hang with your friends! are there any new clubs you could join or finding different hobbies to spice up the day? school is a lot like working life where you’ll find yourself in strict routines to stay productive. while for some, it’s useful. for others like you and me, it can get boring and a bit frustrating. so that’s why i personally inject new things into each day to keep things interesting. hope that mindset helps you a bit, shadow.

love,
twix

[DiscordReply]

From: Lisalovesfeathers

Hey Sh6dow, nice to see you, it sounds like you are actually doing really well and im pleased to hear it, i would like to say, life generally is a series of different loops, you are currently in the education one, when that is finished you will move on to the work one and then the retirement one, you just have to make the best of each of them, there are certain things you just have to do everyday becasue you have to so doing other little things to brighten your day will improve it, if you cant go for a walk cos its raining maybe you could sit and write an email to a friend that you havent spoken to for a while or if you like art draw something. the rain will soon clear and you will be back out enjoying the fresh air again. Your not taking up our time either, its what we do, its part of our loop. take care friend. xx

[DiscordReply]

From: Dr Hogarth

Hi Sh6dow,

It’s been a while since we’re run into each other, so I’m glad to hear from you. There is never any need to apologise. All of us have written on the wall when we’ve needed help and that help is entirely mutal.

I remember that feeling of looping everyday at school and, if I’m honest, I still feel it now. Most days are pretty repetitive. I also get bored of the day-to-day. I agree a lot with what Aardvark said; finding new interests and people can be an excellent way of shaking things up. Getting immersed in a type of music or art and just letting that take over how you dress, how you write, how you frame the world. That helps me. Doing things that are outside your comfort zone or that widen your horizons can make that loop feel, well, less loopy.

You’re loved too friend. x