Everything went bad

So a little back ground on my situation basically in the start of the year i found out My mom, and i have to try to move out of my child hood home (i lived there since i was 3 or 4 and im now 17) before it turns into a foreclosure. Also around the time i found out we had to move my mom was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. So we stayed with my grandparents just me, her ,and my dog. My grandparents decided to get rid of my dog that ive had since fourth grade while i was at school with out telling me. My grandparents and i had a lot of issues with each other and they were very mean to my mom and i they kicked me out so i moved in with my best friend long story short he got mad at his mom for something stupid and started to decided to run away and just left me, so his mom said i couldn’t stay there anymore because of his actions. Now im living with my boyfriend of 8 months, which is nice because i love him but this whole stressful situation has made me feel really stressed and feel like im losing myself. I miss everything i didnt know it was possible to be homesick for more than 4 months. I hardly get to see my mom and i miss her. Shes staying in our old empty house thats still not sold and my sisters go by there to take care of here. Shes been doing really well with treatment. Every thing just dosnt feel right i just started senior year and im stressed i miss having privacy being someone who has already always struggled really bad with anxiety makes everything worse caused i have no way to isolate myself. i cant talk to anyone cause everyone just assumes im such a strong person and can handle anything cause i have handled alot in my life but lately i havnt felt strong i always randomly choke up and feel like im going to explode.

It’s okay to cry and deal with your situation. It’s not okay to bottle it up. If you need to vent, do it. If you need to cry it out, do it. If you want to scream at the top of your lungs, do it! There’s no shame in breaking down when life gets hard, just know you gotta pick yourself back up and keep going. It seems like you’re doing a great job, even though its hard, and you gotta keep it up!

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I will be honest, I need to work on this myself. But i have know of several people that have used mindfulness and meditation to ease anxiety. It takes practice and patience. There are several apps to help. It can be hard to find moments of quiet. I want to committ to trying this myself. I am a “stuffer” I think the fact that we do not seem to break (we hide it) people think we don’t - but we do. You are not alone, you are strong even though you have weak moments. Sometimes it is all the fighting that makes us so tired, sometimes you just need to let it go, the worry, the despair. Let it go and have faith that it will work out. Maybe not how you think it should, maybe in ways you could have never concieved. You have to realize you are not in control, the world keeps turning despite how we feel. There is a plan and a path to your destination. The best we can do is care for ourselves and lean on a few good people we are fortunate to meet along the way.

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I’m so sorry that you’ve been dealing with all of this. I’m glad you have your boyfriend to be there with you. I don’t know why you have a lack of time to see your mother, but maybe you can schedule some time that you can visit her and stick with that, so you know you always have that time. It’s ok to cry, but it sounds like your boyfriend really wants to help you and I think it could benefit you to talk to him about how you’re really feeling. I know it sounds scary, but he’s already helping you out with your situation, so you know you’re not alone, let him help you with the rest too. Just because you’re in a difficult situation right now doesn’t mean you’re not strong. It’s okay to come down for a bit to recharge.

Hold Fast
Kayla

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I am so sorry to hear about your situation. That’s a really tough place to be. If you don’t mind giving me your name I will pray for you.
Let all your emotions out. Tell your boyfriend how you feel and how much it means to you that he his helping you through this difficult time. Also try and make time to visit with your mom when possible. You can’t change the past but you can reach for a brighter future. Is there any hobbies that you do? Try to take some time for yourself. Do something that you really truly enjoy from time to time. Wake up in the morning and find a quiet place and take 1 minute to reflect and how to be positive for the day.

Continue to let out what you feel on here.

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