I struggle with building a close connection with someone because I become afraid of being let down…lied to, betrayed, ignored, or hurt in general. I’m not completely sure why I have become so protective of myself or when this started…however tonight, I feel like I’ve been lied to by my significant other. And it’s not even anything big, I just feel hurt because she practically promised she wouldn’t be out all day so her and I could spend the evening together. Only people close to me can hurt me this easily and it’s frustrating. I’m trying to understand this and simply “let it go.” Am I just being overly sensitive?
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I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive, however, maybe she didn’t mean to be dishonest and just took a little longer than she meant to. Never know what could have happened. But, it would be worth gently talking to her about when she gets back. Just let her know that you were a little sad that she hadn’t come back sooner so you guys could hang out. Expressing your feelings calmly often will allow them to be better received and allow the other person to calmly be able to talk back. Exchange feelings, then maybe you can set up a day to yourselves to make up for it. Then the issue will be handled, no major upset and you can comfortably “let it go” with no hard feelings.
As far as being protective of yourself…I can understand that. I’ve been there. Though we have to be careful not to rob ourselves of the chance to build relationships due to living in fear. To build and make relationships often means taking a little bit of a risk. Taking a chance. Not everyone is a bad seed or will betray, hurt and abandon you.
I get it though. As I often struggle to reach out and extend myself to new people. It’s tough. Maybe you can use that meetup site to find local groups who have similar interests. Like board games. Find a chill group to game with. That could be fun (:
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