"Fear, Afraid, discouraged" of being loved

What Does Love mean to you? How can you show love to yourself or others?
How can You tell when it gets too much, too much to where stress, anxiety, and fear get you to the point where you feel like the relationships around you cause you to be afraid of the outcome that will potentially be caused by what you are surrounded by?

I came across this video “When life hurts” - Ben Lionel Scott, audio that fits right into what I have been sorta dealing with but needed to I guess hear it. What had stood out to me was:

“Just because you feel afraid, doesn’t mean you have to be afraid.
Just because you feel discouraged, doesn’t mean you have to be discouraged.
Just because you have fear doesn’t mean fear has you.
The sentence out of your mouth is a story that you’re putting out.”-Ben Lionel Scott

“I’ve made too many mistakes
I am a failure
Nobody can help me I have done too many bad things”-Ben Lionel Scott


When it comes to this, it’s hard for me to feel like I am loved because of what I’m going through. I know I am loved but I don’t feel like I’m loved. The actions that I’ve been shown in the past don’t make me feel like I am “loved”. I don’t know how I can get that back.
For those who don’t know, I am currently stuck in a narcissistic situation with my father. My father has mentally drained me. the emotional abuse he has caused. making me feel like I’m a punching bag because my mother has issues with my father ( they are divorced).
I am just tired of everything I’ve been through. But one thing is, Will I ever find love or get love from someone?

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Whether or not you feel loved, always remember that you deserve love. Remaining aware of that can help with self-love. Actually, self-love is requisite to most effectively loving others.

It sounds like you’re hoping to receive love from people who aren’t very good at giving it. A narcissist has a short circuit in their ability to feel or express love. Whether or not it’s intentional on his part, it ends up being a case of an empty feeling person trying to share that emptiness with you.

I also suspect that they are too distracted with each other to sense your need to feel loved. Instead, you’re vortexed into their emotional storms.

From what I know of you through your writing, you have the courage to be vulnerable, introspective, and work toward healing. I also find you to be an easy to love person. I think you are loved, by more people than you realize.

During lonely times, I’ve found that feeling and expressing love toward another, is virtually as good as feeling loved. Maybe it’s because it’s usually reciprocated instantly. I came to this understanding when I became a CNA, and provided care for elderly and disabled people. I really wish that more lonely people had access to volunteer opportunities. It becomes a case of lonely people helping each other not be lonely.

Stay in touch, Wings

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@Wings,
hey hope you’re doing well.

yeah, I totally agree. yeah, it’s like I’m in the middle of them and one sense of frustration is thrown at one, then one’s behaviors are being thrown back towards me to make me feel these emotions.
I’m basically a verbal/emotional punching bag being tossed around.

thank you for reaching out
-Ashley

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