Fear of failure

For the last several months I’ve been stressed out about things a lot. My doctor says my stress levels are causing me to gain weight and making it hard to lose weight. My dad has been stressing me out to a point where I just wanna scream and never come out of my room ever again. He makes me do everything in the house including his laundry and his dishes amongst much more chores that I don’t feel like I have to time to focus on my dream. I feel like my whole life is falling apart and all I can do is watch my career go down the drain and never happen . I’m feeling like I’m getting nowhere with anything I wanna focus on and my dad is forcing me to live the life he wants me to live. My depression has gotten way worse and my motivation in every day living has been really low too.I’m so done with this stuff he is putting me through that I just wanna be left alone for the rest of my life.


Hey Ricky,

I don’t even know what to say. I’m so sorry that you’re stuck with so many things that aren’t even your responsibility to take care of! It really can’t be any good when this is detrimental to your mental and physical health. You have every right to live the life that you envision for yourself and that you want to live. It is painful when parents don’t support their children but are only okay with them as long as they live the life they want them to live. Maybe you know this quote by Elon Musk:

My children didn’t choose to be born, I chose to have children. They owe me nothing, I owe them everything.

It is not okay that you are burdened with so many tasks that you don’t have any time left to focus on your career. I mean that’s insane. This isn’t sustainable.

Are there any ways to set clear boundaries? Is it possible to talk to him and explain him how you feel in this situation? Does he need professional support? Are there any other ways how you could get more time for yourself?
I hope there is room for a constructive conversation with him where you’ll find a solution that is good for both of you.

It is not your purpose to live a life that someone else wants you to live. You are full of potential and you deserve a life that allows your true self to unfold.

From: Rohini_868

Hi RickyP

Good to hear from you again,friend. I do have a couple questions: How is your dad doing? Is he able to resume doing stuff for himself or is he still recovering?

It sounds a lot like burnout, and that is a real thing. Stress is such a powerful force in our lives, and it can add difficulty to most normal every day things!! It sounds like you’re still carrying the bulk of tasks and chores at home.
<br.> Caregiving is hard, and you have to prioritize taking care of yourself, mentally and physically. At one of my stressed out periods , I used some natural products to help me, like ashwaganda (of course, i’m not a doctor and i am not recommending that you use without consulting your doctor), but I do hope that you can talk to your dad and for yourself, create a daily routine that lets you focus on your career, self-care, plus help your dad.
I do hope his reocvery is quick and he can return to helping out at home as well.

From: eloquentpetrichor

Hey, RickyP! I’m sorry to hear that your stress levels have been so high.

It’s a shame that your dad has been taking advantage of you and making you do more chores than you should have to. Can you remind him that you are there to help and that you are not his servant and you have your own life that you need to focus on? I know that you want to help him and care for him but you need to care for yourself as well. Maybe he has become so used to you being there and doing things for him that he has become more dependent on you and is just taking advantage of the situation, even if he doesn’t realise it or mean to be doing so. I think that you should talk to him and tell him that you feel like he is taking advantage of you and that he needs to start doing things for himself more.

You deserve solitude and you deserve rest to be yourself. Crea and their quote really say it well, you are not responsible for taking care of him especially if he does not appreciate the sacrifices you are making in your own life. Hang in there and I hope things get better for you :hrtlegolove:

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