Things have been slowly improving for me this week. I deleted all my social media, had a talk with my therapist, and been taking time to read/take care of myself.
But I feel an intense guilt. My best friend helped pull me out of an abusive relationship this past year and our friendship is on somewhat of a hold as I recover. In fact I’ve been taking a lot of time to recover as I realized that abuse is something I’ve dealt with a lot growing up (my dad had a lot of anger issues and took that out on us a lot) and am finally staring it in the face …it has also been leaving me with a lot of anger, explosiveness and feeling withdrawn from my family.
I feel bad my friend saw me break down so much.i don’t feel like I’m as fun anymore and I can tell he’s tired. We used to talk everyday but now it’s definitely not as much. I’m afraid of losing him.
I feel alone. I guess it’s not always bad but the guilt is being such a mess in front of others. It’s hard for me to get close to people.
Give your friend space. Later on, contact him if things are okay with both of you guys. Don’t feel ashamed. Everyone here thought we are irritating our friendships, but that’s not true. You are trying to figure life out like anyone else in this world. Don’t beat yourself up. You will get better and stronger. I hope you are having a restful weekend. Thank you for sharing your story. God bless you.
Being away from social medias can be needed sometimes, as it can increase anxiety or stressful feelings. I’m glad to hear about those actions you just took for yourself and I hope you’re proud of you! What you did during this week sounds really great and I hope this is gonna have a really positive impact in your life.
Recovernig from abusive relationships takes time. It’s normal to have those mixed feelings for the moment. It will get better and you’ll learn to manage all of this, step by step. You’re being aware of what happened and now you can name it as it was. That’s already a huge progress. It can be hard to realize this and it’s a lot of thoughts and emotions that appears at the same time. But you’re gonna be okay friend.
Obviously your friend is not your therapist and the time you spend with them can’t be entirely dedicated to those difficulties, even if they’re supportive to you. They certainly need some time too. And that’s okay. Please don’t blame yourself for what you’re experiencing. It’s not your fault and you’re trying your best. You’re obviously a friend who cares sincerely about them. Maybe having an honest conversation with them, not right now but in the future, could be helpful for both of you. You could try to explain your fears but also the fact that you want to respect their own boundaries. You can work on this together.
That is a real fear that friends pull away when they think we’re “too much.” Friendships can fluctuate, especially as people have different things going on in their lives. You are not any less because your friendship isn’t what it used to be. You are loved!
It can be a challenge when your friends get tired of holding you up. That’s ok. It’s natural, and it’s temporary in my experience. Everybody needs time to recharge once in a while. it doesn’t mean they’re not your friend, they probably just need to look after their own mental state for a while. appreciate the support, and understand your friend isn’t judging you, they’re probably just tired. Hold fast friend. we believe in you.
First off, I want to say that I am super proud of you. What you are doing is so incredibly strong and brave. I come from a line of abusers and victims of abuse on one side of my family and I know first hand what abuse is like as a victim and as a witness. I’ve lost friends and “family” members over related causes. When I was first learning to cope with these kinds of situations is that changing how you speak about it is life-changing. You are a victim of abuse, but on the flip side, you’re also a survivor of abuse. You made it through some of the worst things any living being can experience. It hardened you, that doesn’t make it okay, don’t get me wrong.
I hope you find peace and recovery my friend.
This time of year is really tough for many people and I hope you continue to reach out. We’re here for you.
It is great that you are getting better! Im so proud of you!! I know what it is like growing up with an abusive father, so I understand you. I met a guy in the midst of depression and he has been there for me ever since. I recently realized that all I’ve done is burden him with my problems and expect him to fix them. So the only thing I could really do is apologize and as him to forgive me for not being a good friend…right? Exactly like in your situation, sit him down, and open up to him. Im sure it’ll change your friendship for the better, and if not, well then you’ll know better awaits you. Letting people go is very difficult, but it is not impossible. If he decides to leave, just understand that God placed him into your life for a period of time because He knew that your friend was someone who could reach you in ways no one else could. It might be time to walk away because you are ready to grow and he could hold you back from becoming who you are meant to be.
