hey guys. I have some anxiety problems and depression issues. I’ll get to the point.
I’m in a great relationship with my girlfriend and I love her very much, and she loves me. my anxiety kicks in randomly and then it makes me feel like I should break up with her for no reason. I never wanna break up with her until my anxiety kicks in and makes me think about it.
I was just wondering if anyone feels the same, or if anyone had any tips on how to handle this. I just got put on some SSRI’s (Zoloft) and started taking them last night to hopefully help a little bit.
Zoloft will definitely help - SSRIs can take up to 4-6 weeks to feel the full effects of the medication, but most people feel the effects much sooner. Zoloft addresses both anxiety and depression, so it sounds like it could be the perfect fit for you.
Anxiety tends to target the norepinephrine receptors in your brain, which are responsible for the fight-or-flight response. It sounds like when your anxiety kicks in, your “flight” response is to break up with your girlfriend. As long as you know this is just your anxiety talking (and that it’ll silence itself after a little bit of time), I think you’ll be okay.
I completely understand the struggles you are going through. I myself deal with depression and anxiety. It was so bad that it almost cost me my marriage. I was too proud to take anything because I thought I was strong enough to beat it myself. This was not true. I began taking prozac and propranlol to control my emotions.
I know you can make it through this and it may be difficult at times. I was put on dozens of medicine before I found the right combination. It may take a while to find the dose and medicine to control the anxiety. You are on the right track to finding a solution.
Hey friend! Thanks for posting. I deal with depression and anxiety too
Have you spoken to your girlfriend about this? She can really help you if you let her in. Being able to hear and see that we are loved is a huge punch in the face to anxiety, so, if possible, maybe you can ask her to write you a little letter that you can keep on you. I know that, Danjo, from the heartsupport streams sens out little letters with his artwork - and I always kept one on me wherever I went to remind me that someone cares. That could be of a huge help to you, and it’s something small she can do to help.
Zoloft can be really hard to adjust too, so please be careful, and go back to your GP if you have any issues. Talk to your girlfriend. Tell how she can help you - I really believe having a letter hand written by her will really really help you.
Hey @bob, I’m sorry you’ve been experience this. It sounds awful! I’m so glad that you’ve gotten yourself help, I really hope that your medication is helpful to you and helps decrease some of those instances of anxiety and all those thoughts.
Appreciate you sharing, love you friend and hold fast!
Edit: @Kayla and @Danjo just brought up really great points about this on stream, have you brought this up to your girlfriend? I think as someone who loves you and wants to be with you, she deserves to know what’s going on and the thoughts you’re having about your guys’ relationship. It may be a huge weight off your shoulders to have her support you with your struggles and love you along the way.
Hey brotha, I see a couple people already have given you some good words but I just wanted to lend a hand (or really an ear) as well and listen to whatever you’ve got to say. I hope the medication is the right move - let me know anything you have to say and i’ll be here to listen!
Anxiety is a tricky beast that tells us to live in the future instead of the present. We can’t, of course, predict the future though so what anxiety shows us is entirely based on fear, not reality. It is our subconscious attempt to prevent the repeat of pain that we experienced in the past, which makes some sense, except that the future is not the past so we just end up doing things that cause more pain (like ending a relationship with someone you love and who is good for you). Bottom line: anxiety wants you to believe it is protecting you but that’s a lie. It is just fear.
I find it helpful to force myself to look that fear in the eye: You are anxious about your relationship because of the possibility of getting hurt. The truth is, that really could happen. But that isn’t unique to this relationship; that is a risk that comes with all relationships so we have to find a way to accept that. And, if the worst happens, it will hurt…but you will be ok, I promise. Nothing is ever as bad as anxiety says it will be.
Also…maybe checkout the anxious-avoidant attachment style. It’s eye-opening. The feelings you are experiencing are shared by a whole lot of people. That doesn’t mean they are grounded in reality and you should act on them, but it does mean that you are not alone and there’s a path through this.
Congratulations on finding a little slice of love in this world; that’s a beautiful thing!
hi friend,
just wanna let you know that you’re loved. you’re cared for and you are heard. thank you for opening up to us and sharing what’s going on. you aren’t alone in this and I promise you that this will pass: )
stay strong
thank you for all your responses guys. my girlfriend knows everything. I’ve been on the zoloft for about 2 weeks now. I’m not as anxious anymore, but now im emotionally numb and can totally feel my depression harder than I did before the zoloft. I’m holding fast and trying my hardest to keep shit from bothering me.
