I don’t really feel okay right now. I feel like me and my friend aren’t talking as much. The energy just isn’t the same.
And I don’t want to jump to the conclusion that I’m getting abandoned when I’ve been quite busy in my own life myself. But when we do get to talk, idk it feels different but maybe its because we’re comfortable and there isn’t a need to be over the top. Maybe things have settled.
But this stage is very scary because I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I’m not familiar with it and it gives me a little anxiety
And also the fact that I literally don’t have any other friends is making me feel down.
When she’s gone, I just wait for her to come back. I don’t have anyone else to talk to.
I’m thinking of building my circle but I’m also scared of it not working somehow. Like what if everyone is too busy for me? What if I become boring
I like spending time with myself but at times it feels like I’m by myself TOO MUCH
Also I kinda feel like I’m getting sick right now so I’m really in a bad mood.
I understand that, when there’s a shift in energy it can be really unsettling. What I’ve found that eases my anxiety a little bit; try not to blame yourself for the little things. For me, the only way for me to justify a change like in this scenario, would be to think that there was something I did or didn’t do that caused this. That in and of itself is a very dangerous cycle to get into. Maybe talk with your friend and see if they are feeling the same or you might even find some clarity. I also have been feeling the same way you have, some days are harder than others and that’s okay.
Hi Amaris, Has your friend been unavailable to you recently more than normal? When this happens with me, I go to the bad side of things and think that I’m being abandoned. Think back to your previous conversations and remember how your friend is excited to be your friend and you both enjoy each other’s company. It sounds like she really wanted to be your friend/sister, so try to remember that. Even if she isn’t giving you the same energy it doesn’t mean things are over. There could be other reasons why she isn’t giving you the same energy that have nothing to do with the friendship. Have you asked her how she is? Sometimes when we have abandonment issues we think everything is about our side of the friendship, while it can have nothing to do with us. Remember that she has her own side of things. ~Mystrose
Hi Amaris, Reading your post I was so interested as I loved the way you already knew all the answers to why you were feeling the way you were, you kinda knew you were having negative thoughts and even that you could be jumping to conclusions regarding being abandoned, I think its great that you are becoming so self aware and all you need to do now is learn what to do next. What if you were to l earn how to take the negative thoughts and once you rationalise that, which you have done, learn to completely dispose of the original thought?? wouldnt that be great. I understand it can be scarey when you fear the past repeating itself but there is no reason to think it will. No reason at all. Enjoy you friend, make the most of every day. Life is short. Get well soon too. Much Love Lisa x
Hello, Amaris! I’m sorry you are feeling a shift in your friendship and it is causing this anxiety.
I have experienced this before when a friendship that starts off really strong with lots of communication and time together becomes more chill. It may be exactly as you said and you have relaxed around each other. Or your friend may have become a bit busier and needs to focus on other things. I’m sure it isn’t anything to do with you or your friendship dying if you are that close and nothing has happened. I think that you should reach out and tell your friend that you miss spending time with them or the crazy adventures you usually have or playing a game you usually play or something specific about your friendship that you are missing out on right now. It will help show them that you value the friendship and this unique aspect. That’s what I do with my friends and something I actually am going to say to a few friends I’ve lost touch with soon to try and reconnect. Haven’t spoken to them in years or months but true friendships last.
