Feeling too many things all at once

So, I’m quitting both of my jobs on Christmas Eve. I’m taking a new job that is just more stable. No more 40-1hr commutes almost every morning and afternoon, a little more of a salary but more importantly it’s a consistent salary, close to home, and more helpful for my family. Sounds great, right?
I wish…
I’m trying to finish this out strong at my church job, but I feel so distrusted. I feel so used. I feel as if I’m being wrung out like a dish rag that’s already been wrung out twice, and they’re just squeezing every last drop out of me. It sucks… and I know i should just suck it out and finish strong. But, it just sends so many difficult emotions.
Was I loved at this job or just appreciated? Was it supposed to invest in me or was it just something for me to give all of my effort for?
I just feel hurt. I feel anxious every time i drive to work fearful of what more they could possibly think of to make me do before leaving.
Small example, I’m being asked to create a manual describing how everything in the sound room works. How to work the soundboard, how to work a computer, how to live stream, how to run certain softwares, what to do in these nit-picky situations, etc. It is just so overwhelming… and honestly, no one ever gave me a manual to read on how to do it. I just learned it. Someone taught me little things but I just got in there and learned. I dont understand why they can’t do the same.

I’m really here to just ramble what’s going on, because i do not feel heard or understood. I feel lonely and hurt… Thank you for reading.


Staying motivated when your deadline is in sight is SO tough. The good thing is that you want to finish strong. That will help some with the motivation.

It’s my understanding that church jobs are different than corporate jobs. It’s more about the love of service than the money. It’s more like family. Is that anywhere near right? Anyhow, I’ve been brought up with the notion that every employee is replaceable (appreciated but not loved), but that doesn’t mean the transition will be seamless for the church. Maybe they feel like you’ve let them down as part of the “family.” Maybe they aren’t looking forward to training someone else up on everything. Downtime on things like running the soundboard isn’t good.

Here’s the thing though: since you are leaving for a new job, you get to finish things on your terms. You control your final 3 weeks there, not them. I’m not saying tell them to shove it, it’s best to leave on decent terms, but don’t feel pressured to do everything they want you to do. It sounds like they’re asking you to do double your workload to float them through training your replacement. Do what you can do, and don’t worry about what you can’t do. Can’t get around to writing a manual on the sound room? Oops. What are they gonna do, fire you? Give you a bad performance review? Cherish this time. You are in complete control of your workload.

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