Im done of living, I fucking hate for I am. I just fucking burnden to fucking people. Im creep lonely fucking virign. Im horrible son to my family. I can never can change of who I am. I suck at everything that I do. Im terrible human being, No matter what i do whatever it medications, CBD, Yoga, it fucking does not take away my depression. Im so done with fucking living. I want to die and I give a fuck about my life anymore. I dont deserse any friends or family. I got hurt myself, it felt fucking awesome, I love fucking hurting myself, Becuase I fucking Hate myself. It gotten to point where I want to hurt people, I take my board and break fucking people faces. Im not a good person, I was never a good person, Just worthless peice of shit is all I am. I desevre this disease. It all my fault.
I am sorry you are in so much pain right now. That the lies and thoughts are so loud. That you are struggling with so much self hate. I know I’m just a stranger and that it’s hard to hear anything when you are in this place. You matter to me and I truly care about you. My heart feels this pain so much. I used to struggle so much with self hate and lies that people would be better off with out me. I can tell you that it’s possible to challenge these thoughts, to get to a place of even liking yourself. It’s hard when you feel like you have tried things and your depression still hasn’t gotten better and things are still hard. Is there any way you could continue to take it one moment at a time. Maybe go for a walk, blast some encouraging music. Even call up a hot line or maybe one person you can trust. You don’t even have to talk just ask then to sit with you in this and just be here. You deserve to live, to see another sunset, to smile again. I can’t imagine the pain you are in and I’m sorry truly am that things are so hard. I hope you will reach out to someone. To even borrow hope for the moment. To just get through another moment, and a few more after that till things calm down. You matter so much, you are worthy, you enough, you deserve to get through another day, even another moment. I care deeply and I hope you can keep reaching out and find some peace tonight. I know how difficult this is but it’s possible. Here for you.
Hey,
This is not your fault. You deserve to live. You have breath in your lungs and that’s all you need to show that you are deserving of life.
I encourage you to please contact a hotline in which you can have more one on one conversation. There are resources available to help you.
There are people who’ll listen, and people who care, I know this because I too have been there.
Just keep fighting, take it minute by minute. Baby steps.
Love,
Lys (ur old pal Blurryface)
I felt the same way today man. Also I have lots of cbd products and I love it but there are days where depression is too much. But dont focus on those negative things you put out here. Be positive, I know hard to do. But say hey look I have internet, food, roof. Idk your actually situation but try it out. Hopw it helps
You have so much worth and value. I know things are so hard right now. Depression can be such a vicious monster. I hear the anguish in your post, the depth of your pain. Please keep holding on. It may not seem like it, but you are so strong. You can keep living to face another day. You have it in you! You are so brave to wake up everyday enduring this hell. Keep posting and giving a voice to your pain. You are not alone. We are here for you. Hold fast.